Telling a Lie to your partner

[ghosthunter]

I don't want them pity me and I really don't want to inadvertently badmouth my ex to my friends and family.

Its going to come out sooner or later. Its better to have some level of control what comes out. And why do you have to suffer for something you aren't at fault for anyway?

If what you would tell is the truth, everyone would see it anyway. Like you did mention the guy never worked in a job for the last ten years. I think that fact would be obvious to everyone around him. It is not bad mouthing him, it is just a plain statement of theobvious truth.

[ghosthunter]

Yeah it's more likely. The farthest I've gone was to talk on the phone but I haven't met anyone personally yet kasi nga I'm paranoid and insecure.

Well, looks like ULS will be sending you a PM shortly to ask you out for a coffee or something.

But seriously why not try going out socially with a few common friends in a casual situation? After-dinner get together or sharing some views over a few cups of overpriced coffee or tea.

You can even bring your own car so you don't have to rely on the guy to bring you home if things went towards to the stalker direction.

[uls]

haha

no i did not

ask Cathy

[_Cathy_]

Right now I am spending more time with my girl friend. The guys that I know I would never consider dating since I assume that they treat me like one of the boys.

I never really ask the guy to pick me up especially on a first date. Usually it takes more than two or three months of dating before I give my address.

[ghosthunter]

*Cathy

Why not just go out with someone that you might like having a casual conversation with? Maybe even ULS? (joke!) Everyone has had times when they feel insecure about themselves, especially after a break up of a rather long relationship. The fear of the "new" vs the old comfortable habits will fade soon enough and replaced with new happy memories of people you can call your new friends.

[_Cathy_]

haha

no i did not

ask Cathy

He did not.

GH ginawa mo naman ako cradle snatcher.

[ghosthunter]

I never really ask the guy to pick me up especially on a first date. Usually it takes more than two or three months of dating before I give my address.

Ouch! That's hard. Two or three months of dating before they can even know your address? At least the girls/ladies I have dated let me pick them up on the first or by the second date.

[ghosthunter]

He did not.

GH ginawa mo naman ako cradle snatcher.

Just joking around with ULS lang naman. Nothing to really take seriously.

[shadow]

why are you insecure cathy? I mean why do you feel insecure when going out on dates?

[_Cathy_]

Ouch! That's hard. Two or three months of dating before they can even know your address? At least the girls/ladies I have dated let me pick them up on the first or by the second date.

I told you I'm paranoid. I've had several experiences where the guy shows up unannounced and I didn't even give my address then. Happened to me several times, I was in my shabby house clothes, gardening or cleaning the car then the guy shows up in our house. Imagine the horror. There's a thin line kasi between being sweet and stalker type eh.

[_Cathy_]

why are you insecure cathy? I mean why do you feel insecure when going out on dates?

Because I am not confident with the way I look. I am also afraid of making a bad impression.

Back in college when I was dating, I'd always bring my girl friend along on the first date. SHe's funny so she sort of takes out the awkardness. Now she's abroad and I'm too old to still be "dating". Hay.

[ghosthunter]

I told you I'm paranoid. I've had several experience where the guy shows up unannounced and I didn't even give my address then. Happened to me several times, I was in my shabby house clothes, gardening or cleaning the car then the guy shows up in our house. Imagine the horror. There's a thin line kasi between being sweet and stalker type eh.

Trust issues might be your bigger problems.

Maybe you holding back your address might be one of the causes for some guys to try finding it. Some might see it as a challenge.

[ghosthunter]

Because I am not confident with the way I look. I am also afraid of making a bad impression

People are not confident about themselves over one or another reason. But it shouldn't become a reason not to go out and meet new people.

Back in college when I was dating, I'd always bring my girl friend along on the first date. SHe's funny so she sort of takes out the awkardness. Now she's abroad and I'm too old to still be "dating". Hay.

How about me? Almost 37 and recently went back to dating. How do you think I felt? The feeling goes away quickly anyway as soon as you start chatting with your date so you shouldn't put too much time worrying over nothing.

[_Cathy_]

But you're a guy GH Women become less marketable as they age. In my case, I haven't only gotten older but I've gained so much weight as well during my 4 years with my ex.

[_Cathy_]

Trust issues might be your bigger problems.

Maybe you holding back your address might be one of the causes for some guys to try finding it. Some might see it as a challenge.

Now I don't even give my village anymore. And I don't use my postpaid until I know that I could trust the guy. There was this instance when a guy told me that it's a good thing I was using prepaid because he has a friend from Globe daw and he could get my address. I like him pa naman. Too bad he got tired of the chase.

[shadow]

But you're a guy GH Women become less marketable as they age. In my case, I haven't only gotten older but I've gained so much weight as well during my 4 years with my ex.

hinde ba you were just talking about you going to the gym regularly, I think it's just this year?

[_Cathy_]

Yup. I've been going to the gym on and off since college so my weight tends to yoyo. I stopped going to the gym again when I started working last month. My work schedule wouldn't allow me to work out anymore. Hassle nga eh

[shadow]

Yup. I've been going to the gym on and off since college so my weight tends to yoyo. I stopped going to the gym again when I started working last month. My work schedule wouldn't allow me to work out anymore. Hassle nga eh

ah so finally found a job!!! congrats!

[ghosthunter]

But you're a guy GH Women become less marketable as they age. In my case, I haven't only gotten older but I've gained so much weight as well during my 4 years with my ex.

Depends. There are women who are just as attractive years later. Too bad many of them are already married with kids.

There is this one lady who I wanted to date again because of her bubbly personality even if her previously slim figure is kinda chubby these days. She was in a bad marriage which ended kinda hard and in an annulment (husband's fault). I chanced upon her one time unfortunately she didn't return my calls later.

[_Cathy_]

ah so finally found a job!!! congrats!

Thanks. Found a job. Lost a boyfriend.