Is Life Harder for Physically Unattractive People?

[_Cathy_]

My officemate opened up to me and told me he is being treated unfairly at work because he is not good looking. His physical traits are short, dark, fat, hairy and practically bald (in his 20s) He has good teeth though. He compared himself to his cute teammate who he things is the favorite because of his good looks. He basically said life is difficult for him because he is ugly Di ko alam kung maiiyak ako o matatawa

I told him that it had NOTHING to do with looks but more on personality/character. Good looks are a bonus for men but it's not crucial. When it comes to men, looks isn't much of an issue because it can be cancelled out with traits that are more "valued" with men. Scientifically or biologically (?) females are valued for their looks (ability to reproduce and nurture) and males for their strength (ability to provide and protect). So I think looks are more of an issue for women not men.

But my officemate insists that he is being reprimanded at work because of his looks So he thinks good looking people can get away with a lot of things I can't convince him anymore that it's personality that is causing people to treat him badly or stay away from him. My friend thinks my officemate is so insecure which caused him to develop a bad personality. Seems like a catch 22 to me

It makes me wonder, does looks really cause a person to be discriminated or bullied? Have you encountered persons like that in your lifetime?

[uls]

what your officemate experienced all his life is probably like what black men experience in the states

--

attractive people have more advantages

like attractive people are more persuasive

attractive people seem more likeable

attractive people can get away with a lot of things ordinary people can't

[Wh1stl3r]

Most people I know tend to treat good looking people better. That's just natural I guess. But I don't know about life being made hard for you by others just because you are unattractive. I don't think Pinoys are like that.

[arvs18]

My officemate opened up to me and told me he is being treated unfairly at work because he is not good looking. His physical traits are short, dark, fat, hairy and practically bald (in his 20s) He has good teeth though. He compared himself to his cute teammate who he things is the favorite because of his good looks. He basically said life is difficult for him because he is ugly Di ko alam kung maiiyak ako o matatawa

I told him that it had NOTHING to do with looks but more on personality/character. Good looks are a bonus for men but it's not crucial. When it comes to men, looks isn't much of an issue because it can be cancelled out with traits that are more "valued" with men. Scientifically or biologically (?) females are valued for their looks (ability to reproduce and nurture) and males for their strength (ability to provide and protect). So I think looks are more of an issue for women not men.

But my officemate insists that he is being reprimanded at work because of his looks So he thinks good looking people can get away with a lot of things I can't convince him anymore that it's personality that is causing people to treat him badly or stay away from him. My friend thinks my officemate is so insecure which caused him to develop a bad personality. Seems like a catch 22 to me

It makes me wonder, does looks really cause a person to be discriminated or bullied? Have you encountered persons like that in your lifetime?

I think yung sentiments nya nag root pa way back sa childhood nya.

Oftentimes kasi pag mga bata naglalaro, meron talagang isang kinukutya na, ang pangit pangit mo etc. etc. mga nakaka degrade na remarks, though di naman alam nung nangungutya na nakaka-scar yung sinasabi nya.

Pero yung sinasabihan ng masama, madadala nya yun hanggang pagtanda.

I have a barkada (so-called friend), na ang hilig manlait. Kada lakad nalang ata namin, hindi matatapos yung araw na wala syang nilalait.

Kaya siguro medyo may point yung officemate mo na yung looks nya is may bearing sa mga unfair treatment sa kanya. Lalo na if yung mga tao sa paligid nya, is katulad nung so called friend ko.

Ayoko man-lait, pero hindi naman gwapo yung barkada ko, lalo nang hindi sya perpekto, pero hilig pumuna ng ibang tao, parang social-climber na ugali ba.

Madami naman pwedeng workaround or remedy sa mga less-attractive na tao. Sa pananamit, sa ayos ng buhok, sa galaw.

Pero dahil nga na de-grade na self confidence nila, mahihirapan sila mag adjust at mag exude ng confidence sa galaw nila.

Siguro yung mgagawa mo lang for now Ms. Cathy is, parang makinig nalang sa sentiments nya.

[arvs18]

Most people I know tend to treat good looking people better. That's just natural I guess. But I don't know about life being made hard for you by others just because you are unattractive. I don't think Pinoys are like that.

I think nakakadagdag din yung Pinoy Social Media and the Media itself, sa discrimination sa less attractive individuals.

Ang sumisikat kasi satin ngayon is yung mga attractive, basta maganda or gwapo, magkakaroon ng Music Album kahit wala namang boses.

Ang less attractive ang ginagawang pang katatawanan or comedy.

[fireice2]

Well he can do something about his physique...

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[_Cathy_]

I think yung sentiments nya nag root pa way back sa childhood nya.

Oftentimes kasi pag mga bata naglalaro, meron talagang isang kinukutya na, ang pangit pangit mo etc. etc. mga nakaka degrade na remarks, though di naman alam nung nangungutya na nakaka-scar yung sinasabi nya.

Pero yung sinasabihan ng masama, madadala nya yun hanggang pagtanda..

Bullied nga daw siya sa school Pinilit talaga siya maipasok sa magandang school (hs to college) pero hindi naman daw siya makasabay sa mga kaklase niya (kids can be cruel) Pero may officemate din naman ako from a modest background pero daming friends from all walks of life, nakakatawa kasi siya kaya masarap kasama. So I think his getting bullied had a lot to do with his personality also Kuripot kasi kaya KJ ang dating. His penny saving practices are cringe worthy talaga. Kanina lang kumain kami burger, hindi siya nag order fries, kumuha lang samin, e P150 kaya isang fries! Sabi friend ko, kuha ka ng kuha, magbayad ka ng P50 HAHAHA!

Madami naman pwedeng workaround or remedy sa mga less-attractive na tao. Sa pananamit, sa ayos ng buhok, sa galaw.

Pero dahil nga na de-grade na self confidence nila, mahihirapan sila mag adjust at mag exude ng confidence sa galaw nila..

Yun nga problema Hindi rin kasi siya nag aayos. Yung long sleeves nga niya napunit sa tiyan sa sobrang sikip Di ko napigilan na hindi tumawa nung pinakita sakin. Sabi friend ko bumili tuloy ng barong dahil pinuna ko. Siguro makakatulong kung mag shave siya araw araw para malinis tignan. Saka pumorma sa damit.

Siguro yung mgagawa mo lang for now Ms. Cathy is, parang makinig nalang sa sentiments nya.

Ako nga lang daw mabait sa kanya sa buong office. Inis din ako most of the time pero I try my best to understand and be kind to him kasi nga naawa ako. May days di ko kinakausap pag napupuno ako. Tinanong nga ko ng VP ko pano naming naging friend kasi nga introvert ako at piling pili lang mga tao na kinakausap ko. Friends ko mabait lang sa kanya dahil sakin daw. hehehe. Ayaw nga nila talaga makasama kasi nga kuripot at magulang at annoying daw.

[Wh1stl3r]

I think nakakadagdag din yung Pinoy Social Media and the Media itself, sa discrimination sa less attractive individuals.

Ang sumisikat kasi satin ngayon is yung mga attractive, basta maganda or gwapo, magkakaroon ng Music Album kahit wala namang boses.

Ang less attractive ang ginagawang pang katatawanan or comedy.

True. Sa local showbiz, itsura > talent. Pero meron din mga di talaga makalusot na maganda, Jessy Mendiola and Elisse Joson come to mind.

[JC-Tsikot]

sad to say, ganun talaga ang society. Mas pinapaburan ang good looking na defined by media. Aminado ako mas magaan loob ko sa mga good looking kesa sa hindi. Mali pero ito ang reality na sana mabago.

pero ndi naman sha dapat maging miserable for not having a good looks. marami pa naman ibang traits na pwede shang umangat. Mag work out sha or maging magaling sha sa isang bagay like music.

[_Cathy_]

sad to say, ganun talaga ang society. Mas pinapaburan ang good looking na defined by media. Aminado ako mas magaan loob ko sa mga good looking kesa sa hindi. Mali pero ito ang reality na sana mabago.

pero ndi naman sha dapat maging miserable for not having a good looks. marami pa naman ibang traits na pwede shang umangat. Mag work out sha or maging magaling sha sa isang bagay like music.

Panong papayat e puro junk kinakain

True. Sa local showbiz, itsura > talent. Pero meron din mga di talaga makalusot na maganda, Jessy Mendiola and Elisse Joson come to mind.

You don't find Jessy Mendiola good looking??? Or is she salamat doc also? I only found out about her because people in social media are commenting na she has nothing in between her ears daw.

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[Wh1stl3r]

Panong papayat e puro junk kinakain

You don't find Jessy Mendiola good looking??? Or is she salamat doc also? I only found out about her because people in social media are commenting na she has nothing in between her ears daw.

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She's pretty. Saw her in person twice. My point is she wouldn't be in showbiz if she wasn't. But her lack of talent is appalling. I remember she tried to host UAAP cheer dance once with Boom Gonzales. It was terrible. Hats off to poor Boom. That was a painful exercise in patience and good manners.

By "di makalusot" I meant they can't have their own show because of the lack of talent. I've noticed that with some beautiful people, they think being like that is enough. And they end up not knowing how to do anything well.

[_Cathy_]

She's pretty. Saw her in person twice. My point is she wouldn't be in showbiz if she wasn't. But her lack of talent is appalling. I remember she tried to host UAAP cheer dance once with Boom Gonzales. It was terrible. Hats off to poor Boom. That was a painful exercise in patience and good manners.

By "di makalusot" I meant they can't have their own show because of the lack of talent. I've noticed that with some beautiful people, they think being like that is enough. And they end up not knowing how to do anything well.

Oh I though you meant mga nakalusot sa showbiz na hindi maganda :P I think majority of artistas now don't have talent (unlike in the 70s or 80s when most actors and actresses also knew how to sing/dance on top of acting)

[remzam]

Cath di ba eto yung officemate mo na you feel ***ually harassed kasi hawak ng hawak sayo?

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[badkuk]

To be brutally frank, yes, life is easier for beautiful people. Then again, if you will do nothing but sit around and mope, blame everybody else for your misfortunes, guess what, wala ring mangyayari.

On the other hand, baka naman gini-guilt trip ka niyan para mamanipulate kayo...kesyo kayong mga magaganda, di pumapansin sa pangit; kayong mga mayayaman, wala kayong pakialam sa mahihirap, kayong mga driver mayayabang, walang pakialam sa tumatawid; kayong taga Maynila, walang pakialam sa maga promdi....and on and on and on

Honestly, give me a f_cking break. If your friend wants to be a little b_tch about it, then leave him be. We gots problems of our own. He is just messing with your head.

[_Cathy_]

Cath di ba eto yung officemate mo na you feel ***ually harassed kasi hawak ng hawak sayo?

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Kanina lang pinisil na naman ako Nakaka awa kasi nung nagsabi siya ng sentiments niya. My friends and I talk about him all the time because of his defective personality

Kakausapin na siya officially ng friend ko na manager niya to stop complimenting and touching me. Di kasi makuha sa isang salita.

To be brutally frank, yes, life is easier for beautiful people. Then again, if you will do nothing but sit around and mope, blame everybody else for your misfortunes, guess what, wala ring mangyayari.

On the other hand, baka naman gini-guilt trip ka niyan para mamanipulate kayo...kesyo kayong mga magaganda, di pumapansin sa pangit; kayong mga mayayaman, wala kayong pakialam sa mahihirap, kayong mga driver mayayabang, walang pakialam sa tumatawid; kayong taga Maynila, walang pakialam sa maga promdi....and on and on and on

Honestly, give me a f_cking break. If your friend want to be a little b_tch about it, then leave him be. He is messing with your head.

Last week pala ng max's eat all you can siya. Yung friend ko worried kasi ang dami nakain saka ang bilis. Sabi ng friend ko sulit na yan 5 chicken at baka ma hospital siya sa dami ng kinain. So he stopped naman. Sabi niya if my friend did not tell him to stop 8 daw kakainin niya

Naaawa nga ko kaya mabait ako sa kanya. I'm not kidding when I say that nobody in the office likes him. That's why I got curious and tried to find out for myself. I guess it makes me feel a little better when am nice to him since usual feedback sakin since I joined the company e snob/suplada daw ako. In truth, resting bitch face lang ako na tahimik.

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[glenn manikis]

So true... for female...

My daugther were given several big business oppurtunities.. and was always given a better chance against male counterparts....

Just recently, closed a 10Mw Power Supply Agreement... she's in her early 20's... pensionado na... When it comes to Generator Business... this is the big leagues...

Pero it should be a combination of Beauty, Brains and a great product and or services...

[MR_BIG18]

arnold wasnt good looking...

[_Cathy_]

arnold wasnt good looking...

He wouldn't be an a list actor if he wasn't.

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[dr. d]

ah-nuld is good-looking.
he wouldn't have won all those beautiful muscles contests, if he wasn't good-lookin'.

i read many years ago, a mr olympia judge interview. "aside from the obvious musculature, we also look at the face, THE HAIR (or lack thereof), the teeth, the height, the symmetry... physical deformities..".. one would think they were judging horses and not humans...
this was many years ago, when bald was in, but only if one was named yul.

[_Cathy_]

ah-nuld is good-looking.
he wouldn't have won all those beautiful muscles contests, if he wasn't good-lookin'.

i read many years ago, a mr olympia judge interview. "aside from the obvious musculature, we also look at the face, THE HAIR (or lack thereof), the teeth, the height, the symmetry... physical deformities..".. one would think they were judging horses and not humans...
this was many years ago, when bald was in, but only if one was named yul.

I'm fascinated with the golden ratio (which is all about symmetry) I asked my dentist if he can fix my teeth according to the golden ratio, akala ata nababaliw ako