Loving the wrong person

[_Cathy_]

What if you're single and became friends with the girl/guy of your dreams (in all aspects) who happens to be married but without children. What would you do? Are you gonna continue with the friendship and be tortured knowing that you can't have that person or will you walk out of the friendship and forget about that person?

[mbeige]

Here we go again

Seriously though, if you befriend somebody, do so for friendship's sake and the right reasons, not for anything else. Otherwise, you're just asking for trouble.

That includes accepting them for who they are, not for what you want them to be.

[_Cathy_]

why here we go again? kulit ba ko?

What if your real intention is just to stay friends but cannot help yourself from being attracted to that person? Does that mean you have to stay away na from people that "fit" your dream guy/girl qualifications?

[mbeige]

Cathy, pabiro lang yun. I enjoy reading your posts on love and relationships, makes me understand what women are thinking most of the time

To answer your question, I personally don't think you have to stay away from them, just learn to accept the situation and realize it's just an attraction, and that your friendship is more important, because you can have them longer in your life, rather than reveal yourself to them, only to risk losing a friend.

But if you can't accept that fact, then you need to distance yourself, because you'll be torn every time you get close.

[ghosthunter]

What if you're single and became friends with the girl/guy of your dreams (in all aspects) who happens to be married but without children. What would you do? Are you gonna continue with the friendship and be tortured knowing that you can't have that person or will you walk out of the friendship and forget about that person?

Well, you just mentioned friendship. If you would just let it stay as a friendship, then it would not be a bad thing. But if you let that friendship develop beyond and you start becoming intimate with the guy, then it is wrong... children or no children.

Although since there is no children, getting an annulment is possible and less messy than otherwise.

[uls]

friend? friendship?

Wording lang yan.

How come i get the impression there's ATTRACTION somewhere in the kwento.

[_Cathy_]

But if you can't accept that fact, then you need to distance yourself, because you'll be torn every time you get close.

Yes. Sheer torture.

I feel like it's already a sin to be attracted to a guy that is married. I used to think I have strong values now I am beginning to doubt myself. Siguro kaya minamalas ako (can't get a job and always sick).

[_Cathy_]

friend? friendship?

Wording lang yan.

How come i get the impression there's ATTRACTION somewhere in the kwento.

Actually there is strong attraction. Dream guy nga eh heheh

[uls]

hehe i went thru ur post too fast... di nag register sa utak ko ung "guy of your dreams"

[mbeige]

Yes. Sheer torture.

I feel like it's already a sin to be attracted to a guy that is married. I used to think I have strong values now I am beginning to doubt myself. Siguro kaya minamalas ako (can't get a job and always sick).

If he's attractive, I can't blame you, even more so if the guy is successful. However, what you can be held accountable for, is when you befriend him for the wrong reasons. That's where your values are tested, not at the point of attraction.

Just my opinion...