Joke Time!

[boybi]

bill namin kaninang dinner.

Kasama nyo ba si GMA?

[chua_riwap]

in Indonesian Rupiah?

malamang.......

[venrich]

sa vietnam yata yan.

[chua_riwap]

Retz saan ba yan?

[ecneret]

Baka period dapat yung isang comma...

[Starex_Gold]

Sa Zimbabwe

Mayaman yan si Retz, eh.

[Retz]

sa vietnam yata yan.

tama! sa Ho Chi Minh.

[Retz]

20mins Instagram and upload it to FB?

[niro2011]

You don't need bad language to be fun

Remember these old Jewish comedians?

Milton Berle,
Groucho Marx,
Jackie Mason,
Victor Borge,
Woody Allen,
Joan Rivers,
Lenny Bruce,
George Burns,
Gene Wilder,
Mel Brooks,
Phil Silvers,
Rodney Dangerfield,
Jack Benny
And so many others.
And there was not one swear word in their comedy!

Here are a few examples:

* I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport.

* I've been in love with the same woman for 49 years! If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me!

* What are three words a woman never wants to hear when she's making love? "Honey, I'm home!"

* Someone stole all my credit cards but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.

* We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

* My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night; only this time I stayed in the bathroom and cried.

* My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea ...

* She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.

* The Doctor gave a man six months to live.
The man couldn't pay his bill so the doctor gave him another six months.

* The Doctor called Mrs Cohen saying, "Mrs. Cohen, your cheque came back"
Mrs. Cohen answered, "So did my arthritis!"

* Doctor: "You'll live to be 60!"
Patient: "I am 60!"
Doctor: "See! What did I tell you?"

* Patient: "I have a ringing in my ears."
Doctor: "Don't answer!"

* A drunk was in front of a judge.
The judge says, "You've been brought here for drinking."
The drunk says "Okay, let's get started."

* Why do Jewish divorces cost so much?
* They're worth it.

*The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like Chinese food so much.
*The study revealed that this is due to the fact that Won Ton spelled backward is Not Now.

There is a big controversy on the Jewish view of when life begins.
In Jewish tradition, the fetus is not considered viable until it graduates from medical school.

Q: Why don't Jewish mothers drink?
A: Alcohol interferes with their suffering.
.
Q: Why do Jewish mothers make great parole officers?
A: They never let anyone finish a sentence!

A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his father he has a part in the play.
He asks, "What part is it?"
The boy says, "I play the part of the Jewish husband."
"The father scowls and says, "Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part."

Q: How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: (Sigh)"Don't bother. I'll sit in the dark. I don't vont to be a nuisance to anybody."

Q: What's the difference between a Rottweiler and a Jewish mother?
A: Eventually, the Rottweiler lets go.

Q: Why are Jewish men circumcised?
A: Because Jewish women don't like anything that isn't 10% off.

[Ry_Tower]

Video games vs homework....











































Video Games wins Again!!!!

[Retz]

[piscesboy]

[Retz]

[boybi]

Retz, ikaw ba yan?

[Retz]

Retz, ikaw ba yan?

hindi pulot lang sir.

[Retz]

[piscesboy]

-----------------
sa kainitan pa to ng cybercrime law 'to pero mukhang masayang i-share

[Monseratto]

Massage Therapist for Professional Models..Any takers?

[Retz]

Massage Therapist for Professional Models..Any takers?

langhya, ***ual harrasment daw.

[bobzy]

I got this from my Inbox today.......



Wowowee Q & A

These are questions and actual answers of contest participants!

1. Q: "Ano sa Tagalog ang teeth?" A: "Utong!"

2. Q: "Kung ang light ay ilaw, ano naman ang lightning?" A: "Umiilaw!"

3. Q: "Kung vegetarian ang tawag sa kumakain ng gulay, ano ang tawag sa kumakain ng tao? A: "Humanitarian?"

4. Q: "Sina Michael at Raphael ay mga." A: "Ninja?"

5. Q: "Ano ang karaniwang kasunod ng kidlat?" A: "Sunog!"

6. Q: "Magbigay ng sikat na Willie." A: "Willie da pooh!"

7. Q: "Ang mga Hindu ay galing sa aling bansa?" A: "Hindunesia?"

8. Q: "Anong hayop si King Kong?" A: "Pagong!"

9. Q: "Magbigay ng mabahong pagkain." A: "t*e!"

10. Q: "Saang bansa matatagpuan ang mga Canadians?" A: "Canadia!"

11. Q: "Kumpletuhin - Little Red." A: "Ribbon!"

12 Q: "Ano ang tinatanggal sa itlog bago ito kainin?" A: "Buhok?"

13. Q: "Magbigay ng pagkain na dumidikit sa ngipin." A: "Tinga!"

14. Q: "Anong oras kadalasang pinapatay ang TV?" A: "Pag balita?"

15. Q: "Ano ang tawag mo sa anak ng taong grasa?" A: "Baby oil?"

16. Q: "Saan karaniwang ginagawa ang mga sweets na ginagamit sa halu-halo?" A: "Sweetserland?"

17. Q: "Sinong higanteng G ang tinalo ni David?" A: "Godzilla?"

18. Q: "Ano ang mas malaki, itlog ng ibon o sanggol ng tao?" A: "Itlog ng tao!"

19. Q: "Anong S ang tawag sa duktor nag nago-opera?" A: "Sadista?"

20. Q: "Blank is the best policy." A: "Ice tea?"

22. Q: "Saan binaril si Jose Rizal?" A: "Sa likod!"

23. Q: "Fill in the blanks - Beauty is in the eye of the ____." A: "Tiger?"

24. Q: "Ano ang kinakain ng monkey-eating eagle?" A: "Saging!"

25. Q: "Kung ang suka ay vinegar, ano naman ang Inggles ng toyo?" A: "Baliw!"

26. Q: "Anong tawag mo sa kapatid ng nanay mo?" A: "Kamag-anak!"

27. Q: "Saan nakukuha ang sakit na AIDS?" A: "Sa motel?"

28. Q: "Kung ang H2O ay water, ano naman ang CO2?" A: "Cold water!"

29. Q: "Sinong cartoon charcater ang sumisigaw ng yabba dabba doo?" A: "Si scooby dooby doo?"

30. Q: "Heto na si kaka, bubuka-bukaka." A: "Operadang bakla?"

31. Q: "Ilan ang bituin sa American flag?" A: "Madami!"

32. Q: "Ano ang tawag mo sa taong isa lang ang mata?" A: "Abnormal

wala ako tigil kakatawa habang binabasa ko 'to...:rofl::rofl::rofl: