Joke Time!

[Mask Rider Blac]

Search SEC online for business name you want if there is duplicate or similar name ... before you submit to SEC ...

We did.

Sent from my SM-G7102 using Tapatalk

[Solitaire]

"eat all you want, but no take home, please."

pwedeng pwede sa summer

[dreamur]

My name is stress...

Sent from my SM-N950F using Tapatalk

[Monseratto]

[monty_GTV]

A man goes to the famous Lucas Carton restaurant in Paris with his girlfriend and orders the 1928 Mouton.

The waiter returns with a bottle full of wine, pours a small amount in the glass for tasting.

The customer picks up the glass, smells the wine, and puts it down on the table with a thud and says: 'This is not the 1928 Mouton.'

The waiter assures him it is, and soon there are another twenty people surrounding the table including the chef and the manager trying to convince the man that the wine is the 1928 Mouton.

Finally someone asks him how he knows that it is not the 1928 Mouton. 'My name is Phillipe de Rothschild, and I make the wine.'

Finally, the original waiter steps forward and admits that he poured the Clerc Milon 1928.

"I could not bear to part with our last bottle of 1928 Mouton. You know Clerc Milon, it is in the same village as Mouton, you pick the grapes at the same time, the same cepage, you crush in the same way, you put them into similar barrels. You bottle at the same time, you even use eggs from the same chickens to fine them. The wines are the same, except for a small matter of geographic location."

Rothschild beckons the waiter forward, and whispers to him,

'When you return home tonight, ask your girlfriend to remove her underwear.

Put one finger in one opening, another finger in the other, then smell both the fingers. You will understand what difference a small distance in geographic location makes."

[emoji12][emoji13][emoji485][emoji14][emoji39]

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

[dr. d]

My name is stress...

Sent from my SM-N950F using Tapatalk

Ms. Stress...??

[dr. d]

Put one finger in one opening, another finger in the other, then smell both the fingers. You will understand what difference a small distance in geographic location makes."

[emoji12][emoji13][emoji485][emoji14][emoji39]

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

i assure you, in the vast majority of instances, both ears will smell the same.

[Walter]

i assure you, in the vast majority of instances, both ears will smell the same.

Or nostrils ... but both pairs are not covered by underwear ...

[Monseratto]

Last week a girlfriend invited me to her house. I found her sister alone in the house, she was unbelievably ***y! She wore a very tight miniskirt and was bra-less on that day. She told me that her sister had to rush somewhere and had instructed her to tell me that she will make up for the meeting later that evening. We are to get married in a few weeks time. After a little chit chat, she whispered that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn’t say a word. She said, “I’m going to my bedroom,and if you want one last wild fling, just come over and get me.” I immediately turned around and walked to the front door to go to my car, I opened the door and Lo! behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in- law hugged me and said, “We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn’t ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."

Moral of the story: Always keep your condoms in the car!

[Ry_Tower]

Last week a girlfriend invited me to her house. I found her sister alone in the house, she was unbelievably ***y! She wore a very tight miniskirt and was bra-less on that day. She told me that her sister had to rush somewhere and had instructed her to tell me that she will make up for the meeting later that evening. We are to get married in a few weeks time. After a little chit chat, she whispered that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn’t say a word. She said, “I’m going to my bedroom,and if you want one last wild fling, just come over and get me.” I immediately turned around and walked to the front door to go to my car, I opened the door and Lo! behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in- law hugged me and said, “We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn’t ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."

Moral of the story: Always keep your condoms in the car!

Hahaha, nice one. Made my morning. ;)

Sent from my LG-H990 using Tapatalk

[monty_GTV]

MAKING A BABY.

The Patels were unable to conceive children and they decided to use a surrogate father to start their family.

On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Patel kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.

'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Patel cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

'Well, that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat.'

After a moment, she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'

'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'

'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Patel.

'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Patel quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures.

'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

'Oh, my Gosh!' Mrs. Patel exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'

'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Patel.

'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look'

'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Patel, her eyes wide with amazement.

'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And! for more than three hours, too.”

“The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'

Mrs. Patel leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

'Tripod?'

'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'

Mrs. Patel fainted!!!

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

[Monseratto]

[maxpedition]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Sent from my SM-G955F using Tapatalk

[cast_no_shadow]

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[dreamur]

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Nice one!

Sent from my SM-N950F using Tapatalk

[Monseratto]

[Archerfish]

Very funny! I never realized that I also do this until now.

[_Cathy_]

Anything my fat lab does is entertaining for me. I love watching her eat

Sent from my GT-N7100 using Tapatalk

[xwangbu]

matagal na pla nagmerge Grab and Uber - si bitoy pa pioneer hehe

https://youtu.be/6Y75n_kqqz0

[Monseratto]

Reason why buy a stick shift....