Article: Generation who refuse to grow up...

[vinj]

Happened by this article:

Generation who refuse to grow up: No mortgage. No marriage. No children. No career plan. Like so many 30-somethings, Marianne Power admits she's one of them... | Mail Online

Quite true even here in the Philippines. In my batch, there seems to be a lot of unmarried people while others are just planning on getting tied down at this point (early to mid 30s). Heck, i even know people in their 40s who behave and live like teenagers off at their parent's home. It's a mix though, some are really tied down to their careers and are enjoying the date and party scene, some are parents but still live the semi-single life, while some are just well... :smoke:

On another note, i think the young married people today are also more in touch with their kids... or maybe i'm just delusional and my kids see me as an old hermit.

[holdencaulfield]

kinanta ng grade 2 daughter ko last week sa english class niya (not music). yung madre napakunot noo.

i dont want to grow up - RAMONES
When I'm lyin' in my bed at night
I don't wanna grow up
Nothing ever seems to turn out right
I don't wanna grow up
How do you move in a world of fog that's
always changing things
Makes wish that I could be a dog
When I see the price that you pay
I don't wanna grow up
I don't ever want to be that way
I don't wanna grow up
Seems that folks turn into things
that they never want
The only thing to live for is today...
I'm gonna put a hole in my T.V. set
I don't wanna grow up
Open up the medicine chest
I don't wanna grow up
I don't wanna have to shout it out
I don't want my hair to fall out
I don't wanna be filled with doubt
I don't wanna be a good boy scout
I don't wanna have to learn to count
I don't wanna have the biggest amount
I don't wanna grow up
Well when I see my parents fight
I don't wanna grow up
They all go out and drinkin all night
I don't wanna grow up
I'd rather stay here in my room
Nothin' out there but sad and gloom
I don't wanna live in a big old tomb on grand street
When I see the 5 oclock news
I don't wanna grow up
Comb their hair and shine their shoes
I don't wanna grow up
Stay around in my old hometown
I don't wanna put no money down
I don't wanna get a big old loan
Work them fingers to the bone
I don't wanna float on a broom
Fall in love, get married then boom
How the hell did it get here so soon
I don't wanna grow up

[uls]

Quite true even here in the Philippines. In my batch, there seems to be a lot of unmarried people while others are just planning on getting tied down at this point (early to mid 30s). Heck, i even know people in their 40s who behave and live like teenagers off at their parent's home. It's a mix though, some are really tied down to their careers and are enjoying the date and party scene, some are parents but still live the semi-single life, while some are just well... :smoke:

those with great careers see raising a family as a hindrance to their careers

---

adults who live off their parents usually have successful parents (otherwise there's nothing to live off). there's no pressure on them to work to support their parents coz the parents are capable of supporting themselves

[_Cathy_]

This is so true. Most my friends marry in their late 20s and early 30s. I still have a lot of friends that are single and living with their parents.

My good friend and I once talked about how our parents were able to afford what they did when they were our age -30s (house, cars, education for children). I really cannot imagine sending a child to school with my salary now (and assuming my husband and I earn the same). How much is tuition for grade school? Last time I heard it was at P100-120k annually. Probably times really are harder now. There isn't much pressure since there are still a lot of us that are single. I have one friend that got married at 23 and everyone thought she was too young then and did not get to enjoy her youth. Now we feel like she is trying too hard to prove to us that marrying young was a good decision (but that's a different story). Also I noticed that those that marry late have a very good relationship with their family, there's really no urgency to leave your current setup if you enjoy it. But then when you reach 30, tinataboy ka na ng parents to build a family

I find 30s single and living with parents acceptable but the number of 40s and still single and living with their parents is growing as well! My ex is turning 40 now and I don't think he has plans (or is capable) of living away from his parents. I have another good buy friend in his mid 40s in the same situation My Mom is training me now to be independent. Now I have to pay for my own gas. I hope I do not have to pay for maintenance or contribute for utilities yet kasi ngayon pa lang naghihirap na ko paying for gas :hammer:

The bad side din about marrying old would be you won't get to enjoy your children (or grandchildren) as much anymore. My parents had me very late din and I always wish they had me when they were younger and that I had more siblings.

[uls]

My parents had me very late din and I always wish they had me when I was younger and that I had more siblings.

you mean you wish your parents had you when THEY were younger

[_Cathy_]

Yes that is what I meant. Edited my post na

[uls]

Probably times really are harder now.

usually it's educated people who are afraid of starting a family coz they think they couldnt afford it

pero tingnan mo mga poor walang isip isip gawa lang nang gawa ng bata

[_Cathy_]

usually it's educated people who are afraid of starting a family coz they think they couldnt afford it

pero tingnan mo mga poor walang isip isip gawa lang nang gawa ng bata

I only want to be able to afford what my parents gave us growing up. I don't want anything less for my children. But then it really makes me wonder, my friend that married young is able to send her child to a very good school, purchase cars every 5 yrs, travel annually etc. She is only a housewife. We know where her husband works and have an idea of the salary range. We cannot imagine how they could afford all that yet she stands by her word that they get no support from the parents. So that's why my friends and I think that they are still getting support and she is too proud to admit it. Kasi she does not want to hear us tell her why she married young

[vinj]

adults who live off their parents usually have successful parents (otherwise there's nothing to live off). there's no pressure on them to work to support their parents coz the parents are capable of supporting themselves

And waiting for the eventual inheritance i guess.

*C4U, my salary isn't that great but i still manage to send two kids to good schools. I'm sure it's the same for most married tsikoteers here. I have friends who live with their parents and take home twice my salary and yet they still find it hard to save up as well, with no real assets to show for their expenses. It's different when you have the cushion of home as against being thrown at the fire immediately to fend for one's self.

[Lew_Alcindor]

usually it's educated people who are afraid of starting a family coz they think they couldnt afford it

in a sense you're right. ganyan din ako nun tapos yung ex-gf ko 5 years older so mejo doble pressure.
pero ang advice na nakukuha nun eh kung sigurado na ako sa gf, wag ko na daw hintayin na yumaman. masarap daw feeling na kayong mag-asawa ang nagpupundar.

well, nakinig naman ako sa kanila pero hindi naman ako sobrang bata nun. mga 27 yrs old ako. yung nga nga lang hindi ko natapos MS ko dahil sa trabaho.

[_Cathy_]

And waiting for the eventual inheritance i guess.

*C4U, my salary isn't that great but i still manage to send two kids to good schools. I'm sure it's the same for most married tsikoteers here. I have friends who live with their parents and take home twice my salary and yet they still find it hard to save up as well, with no real assets to show for their expenses. It's different when you have the cushion of home as against being thrown at the fire immediately to fend for one's self.

I computed my net and assuming my husband earns the same, hindi talaga kaya. I am earning too low. I kinda regret having my 5 year hiatus from working, that really affected my job offer kasi. I also find it very frustrating that I don't have any assets that I earned for myself. I told my Mom I am sorry that I am a failure. drama. hehehe.

[niky]

Money is hard everywhere.

Lots of Americans now are living at home and trying to save up for their own houses and children.

Personally, I've seen much of my savings wiped out due to business trouble (personal business, not the family business, thankfully), and am only now crawling out of that hole.

At least I make enough to send our first kid to school and put food on the table. And eventually, things will get better.

[uls]

I also find it very frustrating that I don't have any assets that I earned for myself. I told my Mom I am sorry that I am a failure. drama. hehehe.

assets? your collection of nail polish

[CVT]

And waiting for the eventual inheritance i guess.

*C4U, my salary isn't that great but i still manage to send two kids to good schools. I'm sure it's the same for most married tsikoteers here. I have friends who live with their parents and take home twice my salary and yet they still find it hard to save up as well, with no real assets to show for their expenses. It's different when you have the cushion of home as against being thrown at the fire immediately to fend for one's self.

That is why I am telling my kids that as soon as they graduate from college,- "they can do whatever they want,- relocate abroad or move out of the house"... it pains me I admit, but I need to impress that on them... The earlier they become independent, the better for wifey and myself....

Of course, we are thinking ahead,- like buying properties (for them- which they are not aware of) so that they can start their married life pretty well...

Looking back, the biggest financial challenge that we encountered was buying our first house (and it was a good thing that I saved enough money for this). And so, with that experience, we hope that we can augment their financial capability when they go through that same stage in life... Of course, we will ask them to pay for the property but without the oppressing interest rate of the lending institutions....

20.0K:lollipop:

[_Cathy_]

Hindi ba bigay na lang yung property?

This reminds me of my cousins which were each given condos by their parents for them to live independent when they get married. The problem is they sold it off naman when things got bad. So really discipline is important for the children.

[cast_no_shadow]

I envy those rags to riches stories.

nagsikap from being nothing to having everything.

Each of us have their own story to share about their parents success story.

Kadalasan either old rich yung family or nagsikap yun magulang from scratch kaya ngayon well provided ang family

ang ending yung mga anak maginhawa at masarap ang buhay, hindi naman sa dependent ka sa parents mo pero lahat inilatag na para sayo.


Which made me think na its a double edged sword.

Would you rather have a hard life growing up pero natuto ka tumayo, umunlad at maging matatag

ang ending ayaw mo iparanas sa mga anak mo yung buhay mo growing up kaya lahat ng sarap ibibigay mo sa kanila

or ikaw yung anak ng nagsikap and lahat is inilatag at binigay na sayo?

[vinj]

Personally, I've seen much of my savings wiped out due to business trouble (personal business, not the family business, thankfully), and am only now crawling out of that hole.

At least I make enough to send our first kid to school and put food on the table. And eventually, things will get better.

Wow, the Lynx cost you that much to maintain eh? j/k man... yeah, some businesses go up and some go down, you can lose it all but at the end, you still have your education (and sanity) to put things together again.

But heck, if something like your family business went down, I'd be scared...

That is why I am telling my kids that as soon as they graduate from college,- "they can do whatever they want,- relocate abroad or move out of the house"... it pains me I admit, but I need to impress that on them... The earlier they become independent, the better for wifey and myself....

Of course, we are thinking ahead,- like buying properties (for them- which they are not aware of) so that they can start their married life pretty well...

20.0K:lollipop:

This too is our goal, at least one property per kid. It also provides some security to their future (aside from education). I can't do what some people i know do (i.e. Corinthian Gardens home for their newly married kid + pangkabuhayan business showcase) but heck, at least giving them something decent will do.

My better half has a couple of friends (her condo roomies before we got married) whom i kept advising to put money aside to save and perhaps buy their own condo at the least instead of spending so much on rent. Instead they spent money like there was no tomorrow (laging nag Embassy, Members Only, shopping, etc.). When they got married, engrande travel naman ang honeymoon. They had kid eventually then both lost their jobs and hit hard times. When they put things back together (business), i thought they learned already but it seems hindi pa rin (i always see them with new gadgets and now may plans to travel nanaman... ay sige...).

[shadow]

My Mom is training me now to be independent. Now I have to pay for my own gas. I hope I do not have to pay for maintenance or contribute for utilities yet kasi ngayon pa lang naghihirap na ko paying for gas

WTH!? anong klaseng training yan? ngayon ka lang nagbabayad ng gas mo?

mga bata ngayon HS, college. sila na nagbabayad ng gasolina nila

[vinj]

Hindi ba bigay na lang yung property?

This reminds me of my cousins which were each given condos by their parents for them to live independent when they get married. The problem is they sold it off naman when things got bad. So really discipline is important for the children.

That's the problem kung walang discipline. The mindset should be that they still work as if they won't be getting anything from their parents/family. Parang bonus na lang if they get any...

[cast_no_shadow]

So really discipline is important for the children.

Thats what im talking about.

hindi kasi nakikita yung value nung pinaghirapan.

same scenario, yung pinsan ni esmi spolied mga anak

bigay luho mga magulang.

ngayon buhay pa parents pero nanghihingi na ng mana.

i'm like WTF?! buhay pa magulang nanghihingi na ng mamanahain.