guys' permission slip:


APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS

Name of Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband:


I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest
authority in my life for the following period:

Date:
Time of return
Time of departure:
NOT to exceed:

Should permission be granted, I do solemnly swear to only visit the
locations stated below, at the stated times. I agree to refrain from
hitting on or flirting with other women. I shall not even speak to
another female, except as expressly permitted in writing below. I
will not turn off my mobile after two pints, nor shall I consume
above the allowed volume of alcohol without first phoning for a taxi
AND calling you for a verbal waiver of said alcohol allowance. I
understand that even if permission is granted to go out, my
girlfriend/fiancé/wife retains the right to be pissed off with me the
following week for no valid reason whatsoever.


Amount of alcohol allowed (units) Beer Wine
Liquor Total




Locations to be visited:



Females with whom conversation
is permitted:



IMPORTANT - STRIPPER CLAUSE: Notwithstanding the female contact
permitted above, I promise to refrain from coming within one hundred
(100) feet of a stripper or exotic dancer. Violation of this
Stripper Clause shall be grounds for immediate termination of the
relationship.

I acknowledge my position in life. I know who wears the trousers in
our relationship, and I agree it's not me. I promise to abide by your
rules & regulations. I understand that this is going to cost me a
fortune in chocolates & flowers. You reserve the right to obtain and
use my credit cards whenever you wish to do so. I hereby promise to
take you on an unlimited shopping spree, should I not return home by
the approved time. On my way home, I will not pick a fight with any
stranger, nor shall I conduct in depth discussions with the said
entity. Upon my return home, I promise not to urinate anywhere other
than in the toilet. In addition, I will refrain from waking you up,
breathing my vile breath in your face, and attempting to breed like a
(drunken) rabbit.

I declare that to the best of my knowledge (of which I have none
compared to my BETTER half), the above information is correct.
Signed - Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband:



Request is: APPROVED [ ] DENIED [ ]


This decision is not negotiable. If approved, cut permission slip
below and carry at all times.
.................................................. .................................................. .......................
Permission for my boyfriend/fiancé/husband to be away for the
following period of time:
Date: Time of departure:
Time of return:

Signed - Girlfriend/Fiancé/Wife: ______________





------------------------------------------------------------



now for the ladies' permission slip:



APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE GIRLS

Name of Girlfriend/Fiancé/Partner/Wife:


I'm going out.

Signed: (me) _____________________________