1. Obama To America: Whoops! I Made Things Worse
2. Obama: Turns Out We Won't Recover, Sorry
3. Obama To America: We're Screwed, Really
4. Obama: Actually, We Forgot To Add A Zero At The End of the Debt Total,
But It Was Tim Geithner's Fault
5. Obama: Yes, I Do Hate Capitalism
6. Obama: All Your 401(k)s Are Going To Zero HAHAHAHAHA!!!
7. Obama: I Wasn't Born In America, But I Love It Anyway!
8. Obama: Screw China, Hell No We Aren't Going To Pay Them Back
9. Obama: It's A Great Time To Buy American Stocks, But Stay Hedged By Buying Long-Dated Puts!
10. Obama: Your Dollars Are A Joke