Six Tips for Bringing Up Personal Hygiene Issues

If you work in a cubicle environment and sit next to someone who has a personal hygiene problem that is hard to ignore, you may be suffering when you don't have to.

People typically feel uncertain about bringing up issues on this topic for two obvious reasons: One, it's not as if hygiene is insurmountable -- it’s more of a convenience issue. Two, the other person just might be hurt, humiliated or offended.

We often look at the balance between cost and benefit and choose to continue to suffer. In fact, the fear of humiliating the other person can be so great that some people absolutely refuse to ever attempt to bring up the problem.

Here are some helpful tips on what to do when discussing what could be an embarrassing topic:

1. Keep the scope of this problem small and the tone breezy and relaxed.
Don't even think about mentioning that everyone but the person with the problem knows about it. This is an important data point for why you should say something, but it would be far too insulting to actually say aloud.

2. Be very careful in your use of terms.
While there is no word that doesn't carry with it a bit of a stigma, words like "stink" or "offend," certainly don't work. Similarly, don't go for politically correct or cute language such as "hygiene impaired." This isn't a laughing matter.

3. Start the conversation by sharing your good intentions.
The last thing you want to do is make others feel like you are attacking or blaming them. You want them to feel safe discussing the issue, so begin by making it known that you have their best interest in mind. For example, "I wonder if I could talk about something that would help me out at work a bit. It's not a huge deal, but it's worth mentioning."

4. Limit the scope of the problem.
Once again, don't say it's been going on forever, is causing you huge grief, or that everyone else has talked about the issue. Since it's the first time you've brought it up, treat it as something that has only recently become an issue.

5. Keep the discussion private.
This means not only during the conversation, but also after. This will help the other person feel safe talking to you and remedying the problem.

6. If it's feasible, try to give the other person an out or excuse.
For example, "Recently I get the feeling that maybe you've been exercising before work or something. In any case, we work so close together that I'm wondering if we can talk about a change that's affecting our working environment." At this point, you've delicately placed the problem in the open and the quicker you finish the discussion, the better. Accept any excuse they might come up with -- bogus or otherwise. This is all about helping the other person save face. Once again, keep the tone easy and relaxed.

Perhaps the most important thing to remember as you approach such a highly sensitive topic is that you care about the other person and want to help him or her address the issue without feeling humiliated in the process. Keeping this in mind will go a long way toward setting the tone and helping an awkward discussion go quickly and smoothly.