Joke Time!

[machine.pistol]

LITTLE BRUCE

Little Bruce and his friend Jenny are only 10 years old, but they know they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce goes to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand.

Bruce bravely walks up to him and says, "Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage."

Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, "Well, Bruce, you are only 10. Where will you two live?"

Without even taking a moment to think about it, Bruce replies, "In Jenny's room. It's bigger than mine and we can both fit in it nicely."

Still thinking this is just adorable,

Mr. Smith says with a huge grin, "Okay, then how will you live? You're not old enough to get a job. You'll need to support Jenny."

Again, Bruce instantly replies, "Our allowance, Jenny makes five bucks a week and I make 10 bucks a week. That's about 60 bucks a month, so that should do us just fine."

Mr. Smith is impressed. Bruce has put so much thought into this.

"Well Bruce, it seems like you have everything figured out. I just have one more question. What will you do if the two of you should have little children of your own?"

Bruce just shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, we've been lucky so far."

Mr. Smith no longer thinks the little **** is adorable.

[machine.pistol]

An Irishman and a Norwegian applied
for the same job and since both applicants had similar qualifications,
they were asked to take a test and led to a quiet room with no
interruptions by the Manager.

When the results were in, both men had scored 19 out of 20.

The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you for coming to the interview, but we've
decided to give the Norwegian the job.”

Murphy,... "And why would you be doing that? We both got 19 questions correct. This
being Ireland and me being Irish surely I should get the job.”

Manager, "We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question
you both got wrong.”

Murphy, "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than another?”

Manager "Simple; on question number 7 the Norwegian wrote down, 'I don't know.’

You put down, 'Neither do I.’ “

[yebo]

ay g*ga!

[Monseratto]

[yebo]

kulang yan, walang steel file saka wire brush.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

kulang yan, walang steel file saka wire brush.

[machine.pistol]

Who am I?

One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual
route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars
were in the driveway.

His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out with a load
of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow Bob, looks like you guys had
one hell of a party last night." the mailman comments.

Bob in obvious pain replies, "Actually we had it Saturday night.
This is the first I have felt like moving since 4:00 am Sunday
morning. We had about fifteen couples from around the neighborhood
over for 'Party Cheer' and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so drunk
around midnight that we started playing WHO AM I."

The mailman thinks a moment and says, "How do you play that..?"

Well all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with
a sheet covering us and only our "privates" showing through a hole in
the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is."

The mailman laughs and says, "Damn, I'm sorry I missed that."

Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds. "Your name came up four
or five times."

[dreamur]

Lol. The mailman always delivers!

[JhonMike]

That was great! :D

[dr. d]

Wrong side of the line...not a joke...>

perhaps if they painted two parallel yellow lines...

[chua_riwap]