University Insults!!

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:48 PM

Sa UP, mahirap ang Math.
Sa Ateneo, mahirap ang English.
Sa La Salle, mahirap ang parking.
Sa Assumption, mahirap ang walang pera.
Sa UST, mahirap umuwi kapag baha.
Sa St. Scho, mahirap sumakay sa LRT
Sa San Beda, mahirap maging lalaki.

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:49 PM

A few days before Christmas, the Monsignor thought it would be a good idea if he solicited the support of a number of schools to get together to create a Nativity Scene in time for the Christmas Mass. The day before Christmas, the Monsignor discovered that the Nativity Scene was still incomplete so he made a few inquiries on why this was so.

Ateneo reported it could come up with only two and not three wise men.

La Salle reported it could not come up with even a single wise man.

Maryknoll reported that it could not come up with even a single virgin.

San Beda reported that it could only come up with three wise gays.

UP reported that they killed the three wise men.

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:51 PM

HOW DO YOU KNOW ONE WHEN YOU SEE ONE?

In a grand ballroom party conducted by the Philippine Society of Colleges and Universities, the Chairman of the Board got curious to know what particular schools attended the big celebration.
Therefore, he checked out the house where it was all happening. Guess whom he found and where he found them?

UP Diliman - everybody was lined up to the attic to have a fraternity ritual

UP Los Banos - they were in the garden mowing the lawn

UP Manila - they were into "drugs"

Ateneo - they were inside the TV room with a microphone chanting the "BLUE EAGLE" spelling

La Salle - they were eavesdropping

San Beda - some were beside the Ateneans while others were in the bedroom with some Paulinians

St. Paul - they thought they were with the Ateneans

La Consolacion - they wanted to be the Paulinians

Holy Spirit - they want the Paulinians

Miriam - they were beside the room of the Ateneans like always

Assumption - they were inside the bathroom three hours already since arriving

St. Scholastica - they were next in line for the bathroom

CEU - some were doing the dishes while others were busy with the laundry

St. Louis - they were in front of the air conditioner

UE - they don't know what's an air conditioner

UST - they were everywhere

FEU - they were nowhere

MLQU - sob! They were not invited

San Sebastian - How the hell did they pass by security?

AMA - they were parading with Jolina posters

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:53 PM

Reaksyon ng mga estudyante kapag nakakita ng prostitute

UP: bayaran!
DLSU: flirt!
ADMU: loose!
San Beda: how much?
PWU: hi classmate
FEU: hi suki!

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:53 PM

School's reaction when flooded

La Salle: Oh my God its baha!
Ateneo: #### its flooded again!
UST: Tangina, baha na naman!
UP: **** pare baha!
PUP: Tara ligo tayo!

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:53 PM

Reaction upon the loss of a wallet

DLSU: Lost my credit cards!
ATENEO: Lost 10 grand!
UST: Lost my Cartier wallet!
UP: Lost my driver's license, too!
AMA: Ay! Nasama yung picture ni Jolina!

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:54 PM

How do you know students by smell?

DLSU: Polo
ADMU: Hugo Boss
San Beda: Banana Republic
UP: Penshoppe
UE: Bench
Adamson: Axe
PUP: Downy
AMA: Lysol

**bunge** · August 10th, 2006 09:56 PM

Bracelet ng mga estudyante

La Salle: Philip Cartier
Benilde: Tennis bracelet
CRC: Tiffany
UST: Silver works
UE: friendship bracelet
PUP: rubber band
FEU: tattoo