What Age/Level Did You Really Start Studying? How to Encourage Your Kid To Study?

[CVT]

Tanong ko lang po sa grupo:
a. At what age/grade level did you really start studying?
b. How do you encourage your kid to study harder?

> a. I was really studying hard ever since I entered school (Grade1). Wala pang nursery/kinder/prep noon. We were not well to do, so I see education as my contribution to our family's welfare.

> b. I want to solicit your suggestions here, please. My firstborn is in Grade5. He does not have the fire in his eyes to study. How do I encourage him to study harder?

Salamat po!

[the_wildthing]

I prefer not to answer a.

When you say he does not have the fire in his eyes to study, does it mean he has failing grades? Or is he doing "average", but you think he can do more? How are his grades? How are his interactions with other children? What do his teachers say? Does he show interest in other activities?

Find out these things to gain insight into the cause of the "not having fire in his eyes".

[CVT]

the_wildthing: A few of his grades are below average and one is near the borderline. I assess that he can do so much better than that. He is a normal active kid who has no issue relating with his peers. We have not really talked with his teachers. However, there are no negative comments in his report card. When it is time to study, he suddenly loses his enthusiam, which was there a while ago. You know, the drive is missing....

[Bry]

I was two years younger than everyone in my class. That's because my parents wanted me to finish my studies ASAP. I highly advise parents not to do this for so many reasons.

CVT: School is overrated. I know a lot of people who graduated from good colleges, with good grades, and they're still jobless. Then again, I know some people that enrolled in so-so colleges, dropped out, and still landed good paying jobs. I say if you get passed 6th grade, that's all you really need in life. TV takes care of the rest.

/dons flame retardant suit

[luloym]

Modeling helps. If your son can see you reading around the house instead of watching tv, or playing videogames, or surfing the net, he might follow your lead.

[the_wildthing]

It was there a while ago, you say. So there must be a reason why he is losing interest. If you can ask him why and he gives a straight answer, that would be great. But he could choose not to answer the question and that'd be more difficult. You may want to talk to him about your experiences, how studying is important, how it is the key to anything he wants to become (unless he plans to become a bum).


Bry, it is true that there are a lot of out-of-school success stories, but they are more the exception rather than the rule. I don't want to get into that argument, I'm sure there are a wealth of resources that back up this claim. Suffice to say that I'd rather bring my daughter to a doctor who has finished medical school rather than some quack who finished sixth grade.

Of course the other side of the coin is if you see him excelling in another aspect, maybe that is where he will become successful.

[1D4LV]

i started formal schooling when i was 6 years old. straight grade 1 na. nung mga panahon naman nun hindi pa uso pre-school eh. and my mom just thought me that basics of everything before going through elementary.

yung kid ko, started going to school when he was 4. the school evaluated him to be fit in kinder level so kinder sya nag start. he will be graduating pre-school next saturday at age 5. so it means, 6 years old din sya mag-grade 1 kagaya ko. although i don't want to announce ths publicly kasi baka sabihin nyo mayabang ako, my son will graduate #2 (2nd honor) out of 70 students..

my wife and i don't push my son to study harder, but we guide him in his lessos everyday, making sure he understands his daily lessons and making sure he makes his homework by himself. hindi kami tutok, but we instill in him his responsibilities. study habits kung baga. we believe in the saying "in whatever you sow, you reap", so yun ang talagang ginagawa namin sa kanya. so far, as we have observed, may study habits na sya, pero syempre, hindi naman dapat bitawan yan.

a tip.... "let your child be a child.." don't expect something extraordinary out of him, and reward him for a job well done. if he wants to play first, let him play first, but make sure he finishes his daily responsibilities before ending his day.

may mga parents kasi na pinipilit yung bata maski hindi kaya, so nagiging traumatic ang bata. nagkakaroon pa ng inferiority complex dahil malalaman nya sooner or later a mahina sya compared to his classmates. and don't compare against other siblings. a child is special in his own right, may individual strengths and weaknesses yan. its up to the parent to exploit his child's strengths and develop his weakness.

imho and hth.

[CVT]

Bry: thank you for sharing your thoughts. Yes, I agree that I am still traditional in that a diploma can help a person land a good job, which translates to a better quality of life. However, it's a dog-eat-dog world here in the our country...., based on my limited perspective of the corporate world.

luloym: I seldom watch TV(except F1) and do take time out to check on the progress of their studies every night...

thanks.

[jim]

i started studying at the age of 4. my mom was my teacher. pag may mali ako katumbas nun ay kurot at palo grabe talaga pero nagpapasalamat ako sa disiplina na itinuro ni mommy.

i encourage my 6 year old and five year old to read. bahala sila kung ano gusto nila basahin (wag lang **** syempre hehehe). then i ask them kung naintindihan ba nila yung binabasa nila. one time nahuli ko 5 year old son ko watching tv (educational) at lahat nung sinasabi nung nasa tv ginagaya nya. pero oftentimes pag nakikita kong puro laro at away sila, pinagagalitan ko at pinakukuha ko yung mga books nila para magbasa na lang sila. me and my wife try to be balanced. pag mataas grade ng 6 year old ko, we always tell him "ang galing-galing mo"and give him a hug or a kiss. pero pag minsan ayaw nyang mag-review pinagagalitan ko rin.

ang importante makausap mo ang anak mo at pinaka the best samahan mo sya sa pagre-review. matutuwa ang bata ng husto pag may kasama sya sa pagbabasa.

btw buying them yung mga v-tech na educational laptops really fires them up to study hard. nakita ko effect nyan. ngayon nagpapagalingan na ung 6 at 5 year old sons ko. yun na ang pinag-aawayan nila (sakit talaga sa ulo nyehehehehehe)

[roninblade]

i started studying when i was four or five years old. saling pusa lang ako nun sa mga kindergaten classes.

i also have a kid, he is turning four this june, and we enrolled him sa kumon to get him started on his study habits.

CVT, as to motivating your kid to study I would have to agree with the_wildthing - talk to your kid. kung hindi helpful yung answer nya, talk to his teachers.

Bry, school is not overrated. get a kid first then say that again. im just assuming here wala ka pang son/daughter. *me puts on flame suit too*

[badkuk]

as far as i can remember i started really studying at around grade 5 -6, all the way up to 3rd year college. after that i think i sorta burned out. buti na lang my grades were enough to get me into a good university(or so i thought B)

personally kasi, me pagka nerdy talaga ako. paborito kong basahin dati ung encyclopedia and nature books. which would explain why i'm relatively good at science, and truly suck at math B)

not really sure how to motivate kids; tingin ko parang they will come a time na medyo magmamature na ung isip niya and start taking his studies seriously. if i were you(i don't have kids btw), siguro sabihin ko na lang na there's no way you're gonna get out of studying, so might as well do it as quickly and as efficiently as possible, para mas may time ka na for other stuff.

that being said...academic excellence is by no means a guarantee of success, money-wise. mas importante imho ung people skills and street smarts. while the guys who are good academically get high paying jobs, guess who's the one hiring them? B)

[van_wilder]

i started studying at age of 4... dapat nursery pero na accelerate ako sa kinder, so by 6 grade 1 ako... by 16 college na ako... by 20 i am done already... na-delay pa ako sa college... i think lugi yun anak kung nag-aral sila ng maaga... maaga sila mag-mature pero parang nagulangan ka sa playtime... hehehehe pero i started reading books na books at age 3 ata or 4... basta alam ko yun tinuro ng high school eh alam ko na nun grade 2 palang ako... so nun grade 4 ako di na ako nag-aaral... pero dahil dun nagkaroon ako ng hindi mataas na grade nun college... pero okay lang... hehehehe

dont force them to study, show them that studying is fun, and let them do what they want but still dapat you watch them without them knowing to build their self-confidence...

[van_wilder]

oh... pahabol... for me kasi history, management, finance, and marketing is not studying... hehehehe... kahit european diplomacy and especially math... enjoy kasi ako...

[badkuk]

sir CVT, agree rin po ako kay sir roninblade; have a talk with him/them.

naalala ko nung grade 1 ako, i was fortunate enough to have a teacher who noticed that, while i consistently failed written exams, i did very well with recitation/oral exams. she then told ma that she suspected na me diperensya ung mata ko. laking pasalamat ko kay mrs. ramos B)


dont get me wrong sir: point ko lang is you might as well get the answers straight from the horses' mouth, or from the guys feeding the horse B)

[city]

Here are some thoughts:

"The secret of education lies in respecting the pupil. It is not for you to choose what he shall know, what he shall do. It is foreordained, and he only holds the key to his own secret."

Give him time. Explain to him the intrinsic values and the importance of studying and learning. I would do away with rewards because it might backfire in the end. The child has natural drive to learn.

In guiding him with his lessons or helping him with his assignments, it's always fun for the kid to relate his studies to practical life applications.


The sudden loss of interest should be studied. Find out if it has something to with his school, teacher, classmates.

Low grades is not a measure of a child's actions. Poor grades can be due to many factors beyond the child's control, such as a teacher's negative subjective impressions, the school's failure to account for individual differences, distracting family situations, misleading test questions, and false assumptions about what constitutes meaningful subject matter.

[yuichi]

tama lng edad ko sa grade level ko...valedictorian ako ng gradeschool dahil sa pressure n yung pinsan ko 2yrs ahead is salutatorian kaya medyo nerdy ako non. HS, ok lng pero hindi n ako ganon kaseryoso khit alam kong may ibubuga ako..inconsistent ako lagi..minsan mataas ang grade minsan average lng.kaksawa kasi at laging may pressure kya inenjoy ko hs life, naging mas palakaibigan ko, ntutong makitungo sa ibatibang tao, mas nadevelope talents ko dahil lesser time to study kaya nfocus on non-curricular activities..college ganon din....pagdating sa mga basic subjects average lng..bagsak p nga minsan...sa mga major subjects like design lang ako nagfofocus kasi enjoy ako dahil puro drwing.then 2nd yr nagapprentice n ako kay natutuong makihalubilo sa mga professionals sa field namin, whereas yung mga dean'slister namin eh tutok sa pagaaral... so in a way mas nadevelope "personality" at "confidence" ko..which i think are the most important than being "intelligent".
panganay ko 4yrs old p lang, pero di ko sya pepressurin n maging honor, as long as na average sya, but il focus more in building his "personality", "confidence" at "attitude"......mas gus2 ko syang maging mas "madiskarte" anu man ang pasukan nyang field.......marami rin akong classmates who were counting grades in hs who r now jobless...................... "cleverness" is better than "intelligence"!

[CVT]

Thanks for your responses.

Yes, I am talking with our firstborn everyday telling him of my personal experiences when I was a kid and struggling; of how important education is for him (not for us, but for himself only); that he is going to invest only 15 years of his life in school (grade school to college) but the reward is 50 years of better of quality of life for himself and his family (assuming he lives up to 70 years old)...... marami pa... baka nga nababanas na siya sa aking mga paalala.... I even asked our parents (mine and my in-laws) to talk with him..... even showed him on a couple of occasions,- kids rummaging through a pile of garbage for their daily subsistence....

Your inputs are appreciated. Promise,- I'll go through each of your suggestions and try them... I am confident that I am bound to hit on something,- so keep them coming please. Thanks again!

[van_wilder]

pinakaimportante turuan mo pala siya ng PR and social skills... teach him/her/them to talk to people, introduce themselves, kamustahin yun tao, and ask a few questions... para dumami connections agad... hehehe

[1D4LV]

pinakaimportante turuan mo pala siya ng PR and social skills... teach him/her/them to talk to people, introduce themselves, kamustahin yun tao, and ask a few questions... para dumami connections agad... hehehe

agree bro. being successful does not lie entirely on an above average I.Q. there should be a balance between an an average I.Q. and an average E.Q.

[miLes]

i agree with badkuk, street smarts and people skills are more important to me than being good at academics, i started studying at age 3 and hindi naman aku honor roll but then studying was not my priority, extracurricular activities were.

id suggest enrolling your child to music (piano or guitar) pansin ku lahat ng musician friends ku (including me) were, if not math athletes, never having any problems with math subjects but of course kailangan mu siyang iguide baka kasi magbanda banda nalang ;) and also get him interested in reading books. getting your child interested in sports will definitely boost his people skills

now with regards to academics, always show your support but not too much na lagi siyang spoon fed, try to teach him a little independence and to be resourceful din, play educational games with him, like scrabble, guessing word games etc. dapat balance siya di lang puro academics or extracurricular