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January 31st, 2005 04:53 PM #1
The European Commission just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have less letters.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"'s in the language is disgraceful, and they should go away. By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaiining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ACHTUNG! ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!
Ve haf also decided zat driving vil be changed to ze oposit sid of ze road. Ze first year ve vil change over ze truks and buses.
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January 31st, 2005 07:23 PM #4
nhhli p rn slang nsa 1st wrld coun3s kc mas advncd tyong pnoys na kitang2 s txt msges me korek d b?
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May 31st, 2005 03:21 AM #5guten tag, ich bin auslander und sprechen nicht gut deutsch, hehe...
kala ko totoo, kasi in real life there are 15 official languages ang europe, kala ko naging isa nalang, daming mawawalan ng trabaho sa euro comission hehe
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