
Originally Posted by
minicarph
it so hard to live like this. lahat pinakekelaman. yesterday, pumasok pala sila sa dojo room ko while I was out. tapos nawawala yun maskara ko, and to think napulot ko lang yun sa car ng dad ko some two weeks ago kasi attend sya ng costume christmas party. tinanong ko kung nasaan, pinatago daw. ha sabi ko eh napulot ko nga lang yun eh!
eh I use that hard plastic mask to protect my eyes and my nose while practicing my new hobby, nunchucks. tapos, napansin ko naiba yun posisyun ng nunchucks ko. napunta sa dulo ng room. halatang pinakelaman na naman . eh siguro nakikita nila payat na naman ako ngaun Christmas season. pag payat kasi ako maganda aura ko pag pasko, masayahin face ko at may glow. when they see me like that, they find ways to bombard me with emotional burdens. ayaw ko na muna sabihen in details.
pero ganito kasi yun, in the past 2 christmases was my all time low, yun first christmas I had a problem outside the family, and like adding insult to injury nun nakita nila ako ganun akalain mo in-exclude ako sa new year. celeb. I was alone only with my wife celebrating just the two of us. parang tuwang-tuwa pa sila na nagaganun ako. then next christmas, ganun na naman, nakita nila I was preparing for Christmas kasi I was making sure na hinde na maulet yun nagyari last, hinde pa Dec 16, nakabile na ako ng Macbook Air sa wife ko, iPhone for me, new Air Fryer for my wife. nun nakikita nila, hinanapan na naman ako ng butas. so like last year, we ended up celebrating new alone, just two of us.
tapos last christmas mag a month before, imagine nyo naman sarile ko birthday kami in-exclude kami. talagang bwiset! so ang ginawa ko nag-pray ako kay Lord, sabi niya do something you havent done before. You know what I did instead of buying things for us, I bought disney ice tickets, circus ticket and another team park ticket for the entire family. I scheduled it sunod-sunod after dec 25, 26, 27, 28, para sila hectic sa activies. ayun sa wakas, naka celebrate kami ng wife ko ng new year na hinde lang kami dalawa.
this christmas, nagpauna na ulet ako, thinking of the fear or paranoia that I will somehow be backstabbed or twisted again, dec 2 bumile ako ng 50" smart tv for them to be happy or to look something forward to . pero muka nag-fade na kagad yun novelty kasi eto na naman, I feel like something's up na naman. I can feel it. na fefeel ko talaga
bakit ba may ganito mga kapatid, guys? or in general, why are Filipinos like these, if you cant keep up, don't go lower trying to pull like a crab others down. sometimes I ask God why he allows people like this. I had the answer na naman noon pa, to make me a better person coz they are the challenge to surpass. eh kaya lang para paulit-ulit na lang ako eh. saka ang galing tu-may-ming New year. para siguro pag distressed ako sa Jan 1, distressed ako whole year. WT! bakit ganto?