How do you deal with being alone?

**_Cathy_** · February 5th, 2009 01:09 PM

Have you ever been alone? No GF/BF/wife/husband, family and friend? If so, how did you deal with it?

I just found out that my good friend who is my constant companion on weekends is leaving for Australia permanently on April. With her I never really felt alone even though my whole family is abroad and I broke up with my BF of several years. I know I should be happy for her but I cannot help but feel depressed since she's the only one I hang out with during my free time. I have other friends also but we don't live close to each other. Iba talaga pag malapit lang ang bahay. She is practically like family to me and she "adopts" me on family occassions.

My other close friend left for Kuwait a few years ago and this friend of mine helped me recover/ siya pumalit. hehe. Now that she is leaving also I don't know how I am supposed to deal with it. I really enjoy her company since we share the same values and we enjoy doing things together. I am also afraid that I will look for companionship from other people. I try to avoid that since I try not to get emotionally attached to a lot of people.

**uls** · February 5th, 2009 01:33 PM

I am also afraid that I will look for companionship from other people. I try to avoid that since I try not to get emotionally attached to a lot of people.

hindi ba that's what makes us happy? by having people to depend on?

if you avoid depending on people for your happiness, what will you depend on?

things?

**_Cathy_** · February 5th, 2009 01:38 PM

Wow ULS you have a soft side din pala.

I like to keep my circle small kasi the less people I get attached to, the lesser my chances of getting hurt. Konti na nga lang friends ko iniiwan pa ko

Testament, pareho pala tayo na walang kapatid. Pero buti parents mo nandito, sakin nasa US. I broke up with my BF recently tapos ngayon naman yung friend ko na constant companion ko ang aalis. Kaya pala may mga tao na naglalasing para antukin no?

**uls** · February 5th, 2009 01:48 PM

Wow ULS you have a soft side din pala.

haha

i,robot ba dating ko?

**testament11** · February 5th, 2009 02:06 PM

oo, totoo yan ate cathy. in my case, hindi ko gawain yun. mas gusto ko pa makatulugan ang nilalaro ko kesa maglasing. pointless yun! wala ka bang close relatives dito? in my case kasi, pag hindi ko na gusto ang nilalaro ko, punta ko sa mga pinsan ko na malapit lang sa house namin tapos usap usap kami.

wag mo masyado isipin ate cathy na you're left alone. i know madami pa naman dyan na pwede mo makausap.

**shadow** · February 5th, 2009 02:19 PM

masyado naman yatang na trauma yun "friend" mo doon sa stolen kiss, alisna siya papuntang Australia? hehehe

anyway, go out more often, malaki ang mundo Cathy.

I just noticed na parang ang lungkot parati ng buhay mo, maybe you're not counting your blessings enough puro yun negative lang ang napapansin mo.

**uls** · February 5th, 2009 02:20 PM

Cathy, you shouldnt limit the number people you form relationships with

alam mo, you have hedgehog's dilemna

wiki:

The hedgehog's dilemma, or sometimes the porcupine dilemma, is an analogy about the challenges of human intimacy. It describes a situation in which a group of hedgehogs all seek to become close to one another in order to share their heat during cold weather. However, once accomplished, they cannot avoid hurting one another with their sharp quills. They must step away from one another. Though they all share the intention of a close reciprocal relationship, this may not occur for reasons which they cannot avoid.

Both Schopenhauer and Freud have used this situation to describe what they feel is the state an individual will find themselves in relation to others. The hedgehog's dilemma suggests that despite goodwill, human intimacy cannot occur without substantial mutual harm, and what results is cautious behavior and weak relationships. With the hedgehog's dilemma one is recommended to use moderation in the affairs with others both because it is in self-interest, and also out of consideration for others. The hedgehog's dilemma is used to justify or explain introversion and isolationism.

**_Cathy_** · February 5th, 2009 02:27 PM

Originally Posted by uls

haha

i,robot ba dating ko?

Medyo lang. I count on you for an ultra rational/objective perspective.

**uls** · February 5th, 2009 02:54 PM

Originally Posted by Cathy_for_you

Medyo lang. I count on you for an ultra rational/objective perspective.

i was being rational

what you're doing (avoiding meeting new people to avoid emotional attachment) is counterproductive, even self destructive

what you should be doing is meeting more people

**alwayz_yummy** · February 5th, 2009 03:05 PM

uls - kasama na yun..hehehe pero my point is, magkaka-tsikot tayo.. we will never be lonely hehehe..diba ikaw na na may sabi na wag nya restrict sarili nya sa maliit na circle of friends

sinasama lang naman, libre naman yun, malay mo, kasama pagkain libre, naishare ko pa MLM ko... wala naman mawawala pag sumama...di naman ako namimilit..nasa tao lang naman ang final decisyon,e.. i just want to share the business.

(may criterias naman ako sa pagsali sa mlms..lahat naman nagsasabi yayaman at kikita at makakatulong..wala naman mlm na naghirap kaya nga ine-scam yan... pero iilan lang ang legal.. at mas maganda kung ikaw nasa itaas, rather than sa pang-10,000th-above member ka na...)

**DonT** · February 5th, 2009 02:03 PM

Reminds me of the thousands of filipino maids working as housemaids here in the middle east. Imagine working in a foreign land, living with a foreign family, eating foreign food, plus not able to socialize with fellow filipinos (since bawal dito makipagusap men and women), enduring that for 2 years...(parang modern day slavery). For me...that's just one step away from being alone in a prison.

When I think of those less fortunate sisters of ours, I always thank the lord for what I have have now...I could be in a worse situation. Be thankful of what you have. Make the most out of it.

**testament11** · February 5th, 2009 01:38 PM

mahirap... naalala ko tuloy yung 1 post mo nung nagbreak kayo ng bf mo, na you lost a daily diary. nung nabasa ko yan, naalala ko tuloy yung mga time na andyan ang gf ko, may napagkwekwentuhan ako ng mga nangyayari sa araw araw. lalo na, only child ako sa family namin at hindi naman ako madalas magshare ng buhay ko sa parents ko. sa ngayon, how i deal with it, naglalaro nalang ako ng playstation2 hanggang sa tamaan nalang ng antok. ok lang naman din sa akin pero iba pa rin yung andyan ang gf mo, handang makinig sa yo anytime

**ghosthunter** · February 5th, 2009 02:15 PM

Originally Posted by Cathy_for_you

Have you ever been alone? No GF/BF/wife/husband, family and friend? If so, how did you deal with it?

I just found out that my good friend who is my constant companion on weekends is leaving for Australia permanently on April. With her I never really felt alone even though my whole family is abroad and I broke up with my BF of several years. I know I should be happy for her but I cannot help but feel depressed since she's the only one I hang out with during my free time. I have other friends also but we don't live close to each other. Iba talaga pag malapit lang ang bahay. She is practically like family to me and she "adopts" me on family occassions.

My other close friend left for Kuwait a few years ago and this friend of mine helped me recover/ siya pumalit. hehe. Now that she is leaving also I don't know how I am supposed to deal with it. I really enjoy her company since we share the same values and we enjoy doing things together. I am also afraid that I will look for companionship from other people. I try to avoid that since I try not to get emotionally attached to a lot of people.

Go on a date with GH

**alwayz_yummy** · February 5th, 2009 02:28 PM

dito naman tsikot,e...

dito kami... dito ako... pakilala kita sa friends ko, punta tayong greenhills tambay lang dun.. or kung gusto mo mag-mini EB tayo sa megamall, sa 5th floor, malapit sa megatrade hall this saturday... i promise you, di ka na mag-fefeeling lonely.

in short, i'm asking you out with your friends and my friends...sa saturday mga 6pm sa sm megamall, 5th floor..tatambay lang..

ako nga, my wife and kids nasa province, alone talaga ako sa bahay, kaya eto, pagdating ng hapon at gabi, dun ako tumatambay sa tambayan ko sa greenhills, dinadala ko friends ko dun...atleast di ako lonely...[size=1]at kukumita pa[/size]

**uls** · February 5th, 2009 02:50 PM

Originally Posted by alwayz_yummy

dito naman tsikot,e...

dito kami... dito ako... pakilala kita sa friends ko, punta tayong greenhills tambay lang dun.. or kung gusto mo mag-mini EB tayo sa megamall, sa 5th floor, malapit sa megatrade hall this saturday... i promise you, di ka na mag-fefeeling lonely.

in short, i'm asking you out with your friends and my friends...sa saturday mga 6pm sa sm megamall, 5th floor..tatambay lang..

ako nga, my wife and kids nasa province, alone talaga ako sa bahay, kaya eto, pagdating ng hapon at gabi, dun ako tumatambay sa tambayan ko sa greenhills, dinadala ko friends ko dun...atleast di ako lonely...[size=1]at kukumita pa[/size]

sounds like nagrerecruit ka para sa MLM

hehehe

peace

**tsupermario** · February 5th, 2009 03:35 PM

Originally Posted by ghosthunter

Go on a date with GH

+1 to the laberboi

**XTO** · February 5th, 2009 03:59 PM

kawawa naman si cathy, palaging iniiwan.. joke.

sabi nga ng mga artista, move on hehe. ang mahirap sa lagay mo is you're still shrouded with things happened in the past don't you? kaya medyo lungkot ka. best thing is get yourself busy - something interesting on your part

**shadow** · February 5th, 2009 04:24 PM

Originally Posted by XTO

kawawa naman si cathy, palaging iniiwan.. joke.

oo nga! mukhang something's wrong sa iyo Cathy...tsk tsk tsk

**_Cathy_** · February 5th, 2009 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by shadow

oo nga! mukhang something's wrong sa iyo Cathy...tsk tsk tsk

Yung BF ko naman ako nakipag break saka yung friends ko di naman nila ko gustong iwan eh

**gnoj666** · February 5th, 2009 04:34 PM

anung MLM?

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How do you deal with being alone?

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