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  1. Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    377
    #3591
    A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" The dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your mother, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense." The little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The little boy replies, "Well, while capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep ****."

  2. Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    1,868
    #3592
    ALAK- trical GIN- gineer ini!!!

    Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation.
    They get drunk and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning though none of them can remember what they did the night before.
    The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if she has any last words. She says, I just graduated from Trinity Bible College and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent.


    They throw the switch and nothing happens. The executioners all immediately fall to the floor on their knees, beg for forgiveness, and release her.
    The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words. I just graduated from the Harvard School of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent.
    They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again they all immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness and release her.


    The last one, a blonde, is strapped in and says, Well, Im from the University of Texas and just graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and Ill tell ya right now, yall aint gonna electrocute nobody if you dont plug this thing in. :electricf:

  3. Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    2,397
    #3593



    😂😂😂

  4. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,566
    #3594

  5. Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    1,173
    #3595

  6. Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    3,778
    #3596
    Nag-usap sina Mike at Gloria Arroyo.

    GMA: Kung mamatay man ako, di ko gusto ang R. I. P. initials ha.

    MIKE: Bakit naman? Ano ba gusto mo?

    GMA: Type kona ilagay mo ay J.E.S.U.S.

    MIKE: Bakit? Ano bang meron sa JESUS?

    GMA: Eh di...
    Joseph Estrada See
    U Soon.

    MIKE: Ay grabe ka naman. Ito nalang isulat mo, B.A.Y.A.N.

    GMA: O ano namang ibig sabihin nyan?

    MIKE: Eh di.. Benigno Aquino You Are Next!
    😂😁😃

  7. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,566
    #3597

  8. Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    129
    #3598
    An Assumptionista was being interviewed:
    Q: What's the difference between a penis and a kamote?
    A: Ewwww, I don't eat kamote, noh! How can I compare?!!

  9. Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    129
    #3599
    oh I want me a doctor

    *** by Profession:
    BARTENDERS do it on the rocks
    COPS do it with cuffs
    DJ's do it by request
    DENTISTS do it orally
    MED REPS do it with samples
    DOCTORS do it by rounds

  10. Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    37,279
    #3600
    Quote Originally Posted by succubus View Post
    oh I want me a doctor

    *** by Profession:
    BARTENDERS do it on the rocks
    COPS do it with cuffs
    DJ's do it by request
    DENTISTS do it orally
    MED REPS do it with samples
    DOCTORS do it by rounds
    "by appointment", please.
    we never know how long the procedure will last.

Joke Time!