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  1. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    456
    #1061
    She married and had 13 children. Her husband died.
    >
    She married again and had 7 more children. Again, her husband died.
    >
    But, she remarried and this time had 5 more children.
    >
    She finally died after having 25 children.
    >
    Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her. He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, "Lord, they're finally together."
    >
    A mourner leaned and quietly asked her friend, "You think he means her 1st, 2nd or 3rd husband?"
    >
    The friend replied, "I think he means her legs."

  2. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    456
    #1062
    An Arab student sends an e-mail to his dad saying:

    Dear Dad,

    Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here. But Dad, I am bit ashamed to arrive to my college with my Gold Mercedes, when all my teachers travel by train.

    Your Son,
    Nasser

    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ------------------------------------

    Sometime later Nasser gets reply to his e-mail from his Dad:


    Dear Loving Son,

    Twenty Million Dollars was transferred to your account today, please stop embarrassing us, go and get yourself a train too.

    Your Dad

  3. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    456
    #1063
    There was this case in the hospital's Intensive Care Ward where patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday mornings at 11 a.m., regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. Or even murder. No one could solve the mystery as to "Why deaths happen on Sundays at 11 AM?"

    Jaime Licauco, Fr. Bulatao and the Ateneo paranormal folks were called. They arrived one Sunday, armed with special photographic equipment, infra-red devices and motion-sensitive gadgets to detect any physical or paranormal presence.
    So on the next Sunday morning a few minutes before 11 a.m., all the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the mysterious phenomenon was all about. Some were holding blessed wooden crucifixes, strings of garlic, amulets, and other holy objects to ward off evil spirits.

    Just then, the clock struck 11 A.M........and......then.......

    ………....Mang Joe, part-time Sunday janitor, entered the ICU ward, unplugged the life support system and plugged-in the vacuum cleaner.

  4. Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    26,770
    #1064
    Quote Originally Posted by joemarski View Post

    pwede.

  5. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,586
    #1065

  6. Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    1,012
    #1066
    If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman.

    He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer's credibility ...

    Q: 'Officer --- did you see my client fleeing the scene?'

    A: 'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.'

    Q: 'Officer, who provided this description?'

    A: 'The officer who responded to the scene.'

    Q: 'A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?'

    A: 'Yes, sir. With my life.'

    Q: 'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?'

    A: 'Yes sir, we do!'

    Q: 'And do you have a locker in the room?'

    A: 'Yes, sir, I do.'

    Q: 'And do you have a lock on your locker?'

    A: 'Yes, sir.'

    Q: 'Now, why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?'
    A: 'You see, sir, we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.'

    The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called.

  7. Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    571
    #1067
    ^ galing ng reply hehe!

  8. Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    26,770
    #1068
    Quote Originally Posted by Monseratto View Post

    upload agad sa instagram,.

  9. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,586
    #1069

  10. Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    26,770
    #1070

Joke Time!