If God had a PC

[ikenn]

In the beginning, there was the computer. And God entered:
C:\Let there be light!
Enter user ID
C:\God
Enter password
C:\Omniscient
Invalid password
Enter password
C:\Omnipotent
And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.
C:\Let there be light!
Unrecognizable command
C:\Create light
Done
C:\Run heaven and earth
And God created Day and Night.
And God saw that there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Monday, March 2.
C:\Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light
Unrecognizable command. Try again.
C:\Create firmament
Done.
C:\Run firmament
And God divided the waters. And God saw that there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Monday, March 2.
And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.
C:\Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place
and let the dry land appear and...
Too many characters in specification string. Try again.
C:\Create dry_land
Done.
C:\Run firmament
And God divided the waters. And God saw that there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.
And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.
C:\Create lights in the firmament to divide the day from the night
Unspecified type. Try again.
C:\Create sun_moon_stars
Done
C:\Run sun_moon_stars
And God separated the light from the darkness. The sun ruled over the
day and the moon and stars ruled over the night. And God saw there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.
And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.
C:\Create fish
Done
C:\Create fowl
Done
C:\Run fish, fowl
And God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that
creepeth where with the waters swarmed after its kind and every winged
fowl after its kind. And God saw there were 0 errors. And God logged
off at 12:02:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.
And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Friday, March 6.
C:\Create cattle
Done
C:\Create creepy_things
Done
C:\Now let us make man in our image
Unspecified type. Try again.
C:\Create man
Done
C:\Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it
and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the
air and over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth
Too many command operands. Try again.
C:\Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 6 errors.
C:\Insert breath
Done
C:\Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 5 errors.
C:\Move man to Garden of Eden
Filename: Garden of Eden does not exist.
Abort, Retry, Ignore?
C:\Create Garden_of_Eden
Too many parameters
C:\Create Garden.edn
Done
C:\Move man to Garden.edn
Done
C:\Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 4 errors.
C:\Copy woman from man
Done
C:\Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 2 errors.
C:\Create desire
Done
C:\Run multiplication
And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.
C:\Create freewill
Done
C:\Run freewill
And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.
C:\Undo desire
Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.
C:\Destroy freewill
Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed. Enter
replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
C:\Help
Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created. Freewill is an
inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed. Enter replacement, cancel,
or ask for help.
C:\Create tree_of_knowledge
And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.
C:\Create good, evil
Done
C:\Activate evil
And God saw he had created shame.
Warning system error in sector E95. Man and woman no longer located in
Garden.edn. 1 errors.
C:\Scan Garden.edn for man, woman
Search failed.
Abort, Retry, Ignore?
C:\Delete shame
Shame cannot be deleted once evil has been activated.
C:\Destroy freewill
Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed. Enter
replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
C:\Stop
Unrecognizable command. Try again
C:\Ctrl_Break
C:\Ctrl_Break
C:\Ctrl_Break
=
ATTENTION ALL USERS *** ATTENTION ALL USERS:
COMPUTER GOING DOWN FOR REGULAR DAY OF MAINTENANCE AND REST IN FIVE
MINUTES. PLEASE LOG OFF.
C:\Create new world
You have exceeded allocated file space. You must destroy old files
before new ones can be created.
C:\Destroy earth
Destroy earth: Please confirm.
C:\Destroy earth confirmed
COMPUTER DOWN *** COMPUTER DOWN.
SERVICE WILL RESUME SUNDAY, MARCH 8 AT 6:00 AM. YOU MUST SIGN OFF
NOW.
And God logged off at 11:59:59 PM, Friday, March 6.
On Saturday, March 7, God rested.
On March 8, God created Macintosh

[Asus700]

how can someone waist his/her time in creating this non-sense.

ikenn bro, if you are the one who created this, sorry no offense meant

[ikenn]

Got it from here: http://www.christianstories.com/stor...odhadapc.shtml

[j_avonni]

I think he used the "voice commands".

[mbeige]

What, and the devil has a Mac?

[170kphlang]

i believe that this thread is in violation of the 2nd commandment

[the_wildthing]

i believe that this thread is in violation of the 2nd commandment

If he's Catholic yes. But Jesus also said, "let he who is without sin cast the first stone."

[empy]

C:\ run sense_of_humor.bat

[mazdamazda]

If he's Catholic yes. But Jesus also said, "let he who is without sin cast the first stone."

Or any Abrahamic religion for that matter (remember, it is not only Catholics that believe in the 10 Commandments, but also Protestants, Jews and even Muslims).

C:\ run sense_of_humor.bat

Kindly also consider other people who don't find this article entertaining.

:police:

[BlueBimmer]

hmm ano meron dito :popcorn:

[Galactus]

Lighten up guys...it's meant to be a joke.

And like some jokes, they aren't funny. But they still see print.

IMHO, above joke isn't blasphemous. I've heard or seen worse

[IIE]

?! kala ko some inquiries about, "if god had a pc today what he gonna do?" anyway, no comment.

[GasJunkie]

gently caress



:fly:

[Zeus]

Natandaan ko yung palabas ni Jim Carey...nakalimutan ko yung title ('Almighty')?, nagbakasyon ang diyos (Morgan Freeman) at pinayagan si Jim Carey na pumalit pansamantala na maging diyos...at meron siyang PC at sinagot niyang yes sa mga hinihiling ng mga tao sa kanya...nagkagulo ang buong mundo

[mmanson]

Natandaan ko yung palabas ni Jim Carey...nakalimutan ko yung title ('Almighty')?, nagbakasyon ang diyos (Morgan Freeman) at pinayagan si Jim Carey na pumalit pansamantala na maging diyos...at meron siyang PC at sinagot niyang yes sa mga hinihiling ng mga tao sa kanya...nagkagulo ang buong mundo

Bruce almighty yun bro.

E bakit dito sa pelikulang ito wala naman akong nabalitaang nagreklamo? wala naman sa bible na isang araw ibibigay niya yung power niya sa isang tao for a certain amount of time di ba? eto ang isang example ng "what if God...".

[kinyo]

He'll first say "How do I use this?" and Peter would say "RTFM!"

[nemo's friend]

OT: Bruce Almighty ... di ba may part 2 na ito?

If God had a PC ... I pray it is Core 2 Duo and nothing else :peace:

[ikenn]

that would be Evan Almighty