Q. Why do women close their eyes during ***?
A. They can't stand to see a man have a good time.

Q: What's worse than a male chauvinistic pig?
A: A women who won't do what she's told.

Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The *** is the same but the dishes pile up.

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.

Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women?
A: When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.