I don't think you just suddenly wake up one day and "decide" to be gay.
I would think you would have to be gay from an early age.
Only that "gayness" has been suppressed by society's norms, hence formerly "straight" people coming out later in life to be "gay".
BB Gandang Hari is a typical example of someone brought up to conform to society's norms (man = "macho", gets married to a girl, have kids) but comes out screaming of being "gay" later in life.
Similar to some schools forcing left-handed children to write with their right hands.
So even when these children write right-handed, they are still left-handed people "inside".





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