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A teacher asked her pupils: "What would be a nice way to die?

A little girl in the rear says: "It's dying just like my Grandpa."

Teacher - OK, and how did your Grandfather die ?"

Little Girl "He died in his sleep."

Then the teacher asked: "What would be the most atrocious way to die?"

And the little girl replied: "That would be like how my Grandpa's friends died."

The intrigued teacher asked, "And how did they die?"

Little Girl "They were all in my Grandpa's car when he fell asleep..!"

Week ago, my Mother-in-law began reading, "The Exorcist". She said it was the most evil book she ever read. So evil in fact, she couldn't finish it, took it over to the beach and threw it into the ocean off a fishing pier.

I went and bought another copy, ran the faucet over it and left it in the night table drawer by her bed.