Foreigner Bullies in our own Country?

[daimengrui]

Got this from a blog of a friend. He was mailed by one of his follower regarding a recent incident that happened in an elevator in one of a notable office building.

The persons mentioned is free to air their side of the story.

You may reach Michael Cole here:

http://www.linkedin.com/in/michaelcolephil

http://michaelcole.livejournal.com

Yahoo ID: mcole1971
Google ID: colemichae

mcole1971*yahoo.com

Jan Chavez-Arceo

http://www.zoominfo.com/people/Chave...n_-360977.aspx

[SIZE=3]MOTHER’S PLEA:

Now read this letter from Jan Chavez-Arceo, a mother:

Please allow me to share with you an incident that happened to me and my son Ramon while in an elevator in a Makati office building last Sept. 18. A few minutes before 2 p.m., I arrived at Trafalgar Plaza Bldg. where I hold office, coming from my daughter’s Kumon school. Together with my 11-year-old son, three-year-old daughter and nanny we boarded elevator E to go up to our office on the 7th Floor.

The lift was packed but had enough room for my group and a couple more people. As a courtesy to the others who were still coming in, my son moved as far back as he could to give space for me and the others. I noticed that his back was pressing the tall foreigner behind him, so I cautioned my son to move forward a bit as the man might get hurt or annoyed. But, as I was telling my son this, the foreigner abruptly, with thrusting motion from behind, pushed my son forward and tersely spoke to him with a loud, gruff voice inside the jam packed elevator in front of all the people. At that point, my son started sobbing already as he moved towards me.

This was all happening in front of my daughter! I confronted the assailant by questioning his behavior, as I was appalled at how a grown man can act so rudely towards a person, much less a child! He justified his action by saying that I was telling my son already to move and he was not listening. I told him that his manner was by no means the proper way to talk to a child nor even an adult. This man did not show any remorse and even seemed indignant.

That was when I had to tell him in front of all those people inside the lift that my son is wired differently and has a different cognitive makeup. You see, it was very difficult to tell him clearly my son’s cognitive makeup for the reason that I did not want my son to hear how he should be described for that man to better understand why it took a while for Ramon to move. We try our very best to protect our son Ramon from getting affected by the brands and labels people and doctors give his condition without him feeling that he is any less than the other kids his age.

This foreigner, having heard me say that my son was wired differently, did not even show any remorse and did not even bother apologizing nor appeasing my son and just kept staring at the elevator door until my party alighted at my floor. It was when we reached the reception area of my office that my son cried uncontrollably and said that this person actually knee-kicked him at his behind and it hurt him so much.

My son was traumatized by this incident and refused to leave the sofa to even go inside to my executive office. We just sat there for a long time and he just kept crying and saying how painful it was.(We have cctv video of the incident in the elevator — thanks to the Trafalgar Plaza Security & Admin staff — and photos and video clip of how distraught my son was after the incident.)

This foreigner, we found out, is Michael Cole — reportedly chief technologist of Times Asia holding office on the 21st floor of Trafalgar Plaza Bldg. We have filed a formal complaint with our building Admin Manager — who has been very responsive — as well as with the office of Makati Councilor Junjun Binay.
Please help us let this Michael Cole and his superiors know that his behavior cannot be tolerated in this country. People, foreigners especially, should not be allowed to behave in such manner in our own country and maltreat our own people, much less a child, regardless of their status or position of power!
I pray that you or your children will not experience this kind of painful incident — when you see your child placed in such a situation and you feel so helpless about it. More than the physical pain, it was the emotional and mental trauma for Ramon (he could not go to the elevators alone after that incident) and my daughter who also witnessed the incident that really concern me.
All these years, Ramon had been very tentative about being in public places and gatherings (even children’s parties!) and normally holds my hand for his sense of security. It took many years of coaching and behavioral therapy sessions (still ongoing) for Ramon to be bolder. This incident can mean a few steps backwards again for him.

[/SIZE]=======================
note: I did a little research and apparently the Phil Star website used to have this story online but for some reason the link is now dead. Even the cache is no longer working.

The complainant is also a very prominent Call Center director.

[uls]

baka etong babae sya din ung naka away ng taga PPSA...

pareho style e

[daimengrui]

The difference between this one and the PPSA incident is, that in this one, we have names to start with. The other one sounded like a rant. This sounds more like a grievance.

Mr. Cole is welcome to opine though. But this statement...

(We have cctv video of the incident in the elevator — thanks to the Trafalgar Plaza Security & Admin staff — and photos and video clip of how distraught my son was after the incident.)

Is enough for him to consider telling the truth. After all pictures don't lie.

[shadow]

here we go again... if we don't know the person/s involved personally and just get the infos from a friend of a friend, I think it's just fair that we don't post the names of the persons in the "story". until such time that we have proven na totoo nga nangyari yun incident...

mods, nioy muna....

[claRkEnt]

hopefully, the knee-kicking of the kid's butt had been clearly captured by the cctv. otherwise, it could have been an "exaggerated" reaction by the kid. note that the kid is special in some way and not used to being in public places.

the kid's reaction could also be caused by the argument that happened in the elevator.

[baludoy]

i read about this in yesterday's newspapers in federico pascual's philstar column. looks legit enough so far but the best evidence would be the cctv clip if it exists

[daimengrui]

i read about this in yesterday's newspapers in federico pascual's philstar column. looks legit enough so far but the best evidence would be the cctv clip if it exists

It's legit news alright, Just went through the company library and got back issues.

Update: It has been reported that an apology will suffice should the offender opt to do it. Well, their emails are published in Linked In and Xoom, they both seem like very well educated people. Let's hope they sort this out without necessitating a legal battle.

In fact here's an insight of his view of our country. He seems to be fair in his statements. I hope they get reconciled.

https://www.xing.com/app/forum?op=sh...les;id=5610506

Found and reposting the Philippine Star Article, Verbatim

http://www.philstar.com/archives.php...922127&type=2&

[coiter]

well kung totoo ngang nasumbong na sa authorities, e di sila na bahala dun. i dunno why it still had to be posted or spread in the internet.

[daimengrui]

well kung totoo ngang nasumbong na sa authorities, e di sila na bahala dun. i dunno why it still had to be posted or spread in the internet.

Dude so that short tempered people reading this should learn by example. It's called freedom of speech.

[coiter]

Dude so that short tempered people reading this should learn by example. It's called freedom of speech.

i know. but there's also something about "everyone is innocent until proven guilty" or due process. freedom of speech is not absolute and should not trample upon the freedoms of others.

so the writer shouldn't have posted the name of the accused unless a decision has been handed down by the proper authorities or there has been an admission by the guilty party himself.

and as shadow mentioned, there should have been censorship or deletion of the name until there is concrete proof that it really happened and the person is really guilty.

and if indeed he's learned his lesson and is willing to fix it, then there's no need for public persecution and humiliation. lalo lang magugulo ang sitwasyon. pwede namang "this foreigner...etc...and now he's made to pay 10million pesos...etc". overkill na ata yan.

if you were having a bad day and you accidentally made one lousy mistake, do you think you also deserve something like that?

just my opinion.

[yebo]

over protective mom of her special child.

foreigner (or any other guy for that matter) not comfortable with someone standing too close in front, gives a nudge. ok, push. normal di ba. try standing close to anyone's front space in an elevator and you'll see.

mom, overprotective as always, sees red. mom has computer, writes bolg.

who is the real victim here? the child? hell no, a push is nothing but just that, a push. a little "move it" nudge wth the thigh perhaps. the only thing is the child is special, and a push becomes, to him, a kick. i don't think so, he did not get a knee kick on the back! if i give somebody a knee on his back he will be down on the floor, crowded elevator or wherever.

me thinks victim here is the guy, whose only fault was giving the boy a little nudge and deciding that keeping his mouth shut is better than talking to this loud mouth woman. he's an expat, he remembers the #1 expat rule of keeping a low profile, he is careful not to make a scene. he keeps his eyes on the elevator door, wishing it it his floor already so he can get out. poor guy!

besides, does everything now needs to be broadcast in the internet? if you have a grudge againts someone in your own building then is it not enough to complain to the building admin? do you really have to write a blog and subject another person to the prejudices which you condition the whole world to believe by your one-sided story?

[yapoy86]

if you were having a bad day and you accidentally made one lousy mistake, do you think you also deserve something like that?

well most people having a bad day can make lousy mistake and sometimes can cause peoples LIVES... just because they are having a bad bad day...

what if that person having a bad day, made a lousy mistake and suddenly pulled out a gun and shot you in the face?? that is a lousy mistake you dont want to happen...

well kung totoo ngang nasumbong na sa authorities, e di sila na bahala dun. i dunno why it still had to be posted or spread in the internet.

the internet is open to all, just be responsible in posting your blogs or whatever comments, thoughts in your mind..or just venting it out.. many will learn about others experiences good or bad...

its good it is posted here so others would be aware that these things that may happen.... we can learn from this..

true or not still this is not impossible to happen especially nowadays the metro is full of foreigners.. so just be aware always

but i also agree that there is no need to mention the name yet until proven guilty... describing the situation is enough

[daimengrui]

*Coiter first of all you saw that I posted the NEWS article as is VERBATIM. And i was fair to Mr. Cole citing he seemed like a reasonable guy. I even watched his daughter's youtube video competing in some martial arts contest. Which to me sounds like he is a proud father.

This guy IS a father and I'm sure he knows a thing or two about child discipline. My point is, if it isn't your kid don't use force you tell it to his/her parents. For me I've been ran over several times by rambunctious kids in the mall, if the parent reprimands the kid that is enough for me, I even smile at the kid and do my best not to be negative. I don't go all the way using force. most especially physical force.

The story is an unfortunate incident. A repost is needed because there are many elitist out there who does this and many victims who may not know what to do. This is exactly the point of the repost.

I reserved my opinion to myself and let people talk about it themselves. You would notice that the article is a statement by the victim. Not a single word is paraphrased. So the responsibility of the names being mentioned falls upon the real author of these statements in an email who was Jan Arceo-Chavez and the Publisher and Writers of Philippine Star.

It is not me who wrote the article so you should not point a finger at me. This is published in a national paper and when it does our law does not prohibit blogging about it. If there is anyone liable here it is the Philippine Star who placed the article over the internet. It spread in blogging sites because it "struck" a nerve on some Filipinos.

The purpose set fort in this thread is exactly open a discussion, that some quarters of our society lets abuse happen to them especially from these "visitors".

The story is one sided but I'd post Mr. Cole's response ASAP should I get it.

Now that's fair and balanced.

With regards to freedom in the internet. Wake up. its 2008. People no longer need to lie to keep a tight face. You know what the worse quality of the Filipino ? It is we hate to lose face, we hate being told outright we are wrong and we act like doormats when an offense fall upon us.

It is not a sin to reason out and fight back, especially if you know you are right. That's exactly what this mother did. And you cannot blame her for getting some sympathizers.

Likewise you cannot blame her for getting detractors. This is how democracy works folks. It's getting more difficult to lie these days. You can be youtubed and googled for your gaffes and stupidity. This is how the internet is shaping our culture. We become more self analytical and in the end hopefully become better persons.

[daimengrui]

Update: I learned that the parties are reaching out to each other and is making amends.

Hopefully this just becomes a case study on expat social decorum and a wake up call to all Filipinos not to act like doormats.

[pitbullz]

madaming ganyan. may kilala na akong isa...binugbog yun pinay na gf nya...duguan

[coiter]

It is not me who wrote the article so you should not point a finger at me.

oh so there lies the misunderstanding. i wasn't blaming you or accusing you of anything. i was referring to the original blogger or 'victim'. so my apologies if there was any confusion.

The story is one sided but I'd post Mr. Cole's response ASAP should I get it.

good then. and i hope it does.

With regards to freedom in the internet. Wake up. its 2008. People no longer need to lie to keep a tight face. You know what the worse quality of the Filipino ? It is we hate to lose face, we hate being told outright we are wrong and we act like doormats when an offense fall upon us.

even if it's 2008, the constitution or our laws still remain the same. does the definition of respect and ettiquette also change with the times?

i'm a filipino and i don't mind being told straight in the face of what i did wrong as long as it's valid and true beyond reasonable doubt. but i wouldn't want my name read anywhere until i was proven guilty especially if it's not a reflection of my true self. and if it's a domestic or personal problem, keep it that way. kung nang-estafa siguro ako or i was running from any liability, i deserve to be named everywhere.

again i don't accuse you of any wrong doing. balik tayo sa nagsulat nun. it's just that any small small misunderstanding may be blown out of proportion and can damage your name and reputation forever. even if you prove the original writer to be a liar, the damage has been done and not all can be restored. a little restraint na lang siguro sa original writer. similarly, stealing a candy doesn't deserve a death sentence.

peace

[daimengrui]

Etiquette is relative to the kind of culture you grew up with. You feel an estafa case warrant a mention of your name anywhere without proving guilt but an apparent child assault caught on CCTV does not? The story is published in print media anyways so what's your point about etiquette? I did not go beyond my bounds adding data to the story.. You can check the Phil Star word for word and I did not change a single punctuation.

You claim foul over the mere reposting of the article hence your rant about why "spread" the word correct? I already told you my motives. I am merely echoing what has transpired based on the accounts of this person, which may perhaps be single sided at the moment but that doesn't mean at all there is no merit in her ordeal. The mere fact she reveal her name is enough for me to consider truth in her statements no matter how emotional it may seem to be.

Stealing candy does not warrant death sentence? Is that what you think of child assault like stealing candy? At any rate the blog attacks against him is a mere slap in the face not a death sentence. People growl at a person peeing at a Ferrari but a possible child assault you say shame on me for echoing a mother's grief. If he did that in Singapore he will be caned and justice will be swift. So I am sorry that I should be shamed for defending women and children from a possible attack on our liberties on our own soil by a visiting foreign person. Because for me to do nothing in an obvious disregard and disrespect to our people breaks my "etiquette".

I believe sir you are too much liberal in your beliefs perhaps you watch too much CNN.

[coiter]

*daimengrui

whatever you say sir, that's your opinion and i have my own. i hope we respect that. you can interpret everything i say in any manner you want and i can't control it. but please also give me the benefit of the doubt. as you said, it's how democracy works and let the freedom of speech prosper. and please, i don't mean to be sarcastic and/or insulting when i said that and my earlier apology. so let's not get too personal about this.

anyway, if you would allow me, let me rephrase my point by citing yebo's comment.

peace. out.

[daimengrui]

That's exactly why we had this discourse. You wouldn't get where I am talking from if I allowed your points unchecked. Nor would I get where your coming from if you didn't further elaborate.

[Gen. Miting]

if we will really interpret, the American is having what they call a "long day" or what the American blonds also call "bad hair day"

the special child became a victim of that fateful day as well as a mother who loves her child so much.

anyway, as long as they're making ammends. it's ok na siguro.