
Originally Posted by
Jeremy Clarkson
Jeremy Clarkson
August 07, 2005
Pass the joystick, sonny, this is the future of driving
By Jeremy Clarkson of The Sunday Times
Gran Turismo 4
Five weeks. That’s how long it is since my back exploded and I was banned from driving. I’ve never gone so long without climbing behind the wheel so, to keep my hand in, I’ve booted the boy-child off his PlayStation and now spend my evenings playing something called Gran Turismo 4.
We’re always being told by the makers of these computer driving games that they’re virtually indistinguishable from the real thing. In fact the maker of Gran Turismo goes further, saying that the programmers drove all the 700 cars featured in the game so they could bring real-world handling characteristics and power delivery to your living room. Yeah, right.
I’ve played these Grand Turismo games before and so I know the form. You start with a handful of loose change that you spend buying a crummy car, which you then use in races to win more money. The better you get, the more you win, until eventually you have enough to fit it with better tyres or a turbo.
That means you can go faster and win bigger races with more prize money until, eventually, you have enough to buy a better car. And so it goes on.
Now this is all very noble, teaching children they can’t have something for nothing and that if they want a BMW M5 they’re damn well going to have to put the hours in.
But the reality is rather different. What happens is that you invest about three weeks winning a new car, and after that a new game comes out in which you can shoot James Bond in the face. So you forget all about your new car and play that instead.
My children spend most of their time playing a game called Grand Theft Auto which, so far as I can tell, involves driving around a city knocking over as many people as possible. And then, when the police come, stealing another car.
So Sony is on to a winner. It can make all sorts of bold claims about how its Gran Turismo cars are the same as the real thing because no one will ever be able to prove it wrong. Those who earn enough digital money to buy the computer cars will have no time left for earning the real spondulicks. So they won’t have a proper car to compare with the interpretation on the PlayStation.
I got round this by cheating. I called Sony and asked it to send me a game chip already loaded with the 700 computer cars. And I am in a position to test out its claims because, unlike most people, I really have driven almost all of them in real life.
There are mistakes. The BMW M3 CSL, for instance, brakes much better on the road than it does on the screen. And there’s no way a Peugeot 106 could outdrag a Fiat Punto off the line. But other than this, I’m struggling: they’ve even managed to accurately reflect the differences between a Mercedes SL 600 and the Mercedes SL 55, which is hard enough to do in real life.
There’s more, too. If you take a banked curve in the Bentley Le Mans car flat out, you’ll be fine. If you back off, even a little bit, you lose the aerodynamic grip and end up spinning.
That’s how it is. This game would only be more real if a big spike shot out of the screen and skewered your head every time you crashed. In fact that’s the only real drawback: that you can hit the barriers hard without ever damaging you or your car. Maybe they’re saving that for GT5. Perhaps it’ll be called Death or Glory.
Whatever, you could definitely use GT4 as a device for trying out your next car, especially if you’re thinking of buying a Viper. That’s just as undriveable in the game as it is on the M6.
But the best thing about the game is the inclusion, for the first time, of the Nürburgring. Last year I spent a couple of days trying to get round this fearsome 13-mile track in a Jaguar diesel in less than 10 minutes. In the game I shaved two minutes off that time by using an Aston Martin DB9. And I didn’t have to spend a night in a bierkeller, singing to oompah music.