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  1. Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    1,382
    #1
    Acura- Apparently Cheap U-joints Replaced Again
    Hummer-Huge Unwieldy Monster Mashes Every Rock
    BMW-Break My Windows / Bought My Wife
    Buick-Butt-Ugly Imitation Cadillac Kitsch
    Cadillac-Crashed After Driver Intercepted Low-Level Air Craft
    Escalade- Embarrassed Stockbrokers Can Always Lie About Dead Electronics
    Chevrolet-Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
    Blazer- Bought Lemon; A Zillion Electrical Recalls
    Silverado - Seized Injectors Lack Velocity; Exciting Roll Abruptly Detains Owner
    Suburban - Stretched Useless Blazer Uses Rusty Bolts And Nails
    Daihatsu - Damages Axles In Highly Advanced Technical Situations, Unfortunately
    Dodge - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
    Dakota - Damned Amateurs, Keep Out of Tough Areas

    Ford - Forget Off Road Driving / Found On Rocks Disabled / Flip Over, Read Directions / or upside down: Driver Returns On Foot / Damaging Rust Overwhelms Frame
    Bronco - Body Rust Overwhelms New Car Owner
    Escape - Easy Sidehills Can Alter People's Expectations
    Excursion - Expansive Xenophiliac's Cursed Urban Ride Slowly Impairs Owner's Neurons
    Expedition - Exorbitant Xeroxed Product Embarrasses Driver Incessantly; Tow It Out Now
    Explorer - Expansive Xeric Pastures Leave Our Ride Easily Rolled
    Ranger - Retarded Accelleration Needlessly Gets Engine Roaring / Reverse And Neutral Gears
    Explode Rapidly

    GMC - Got a Mechanic Coming? / Get My Come-along / Garbage Master Cylinder / or upside down:
    Couldn't Make the Grade / Corroding in My Garage
    Denali - Docile Engine Needs A Little Injection
    Envoy - Expensive New Vehicle Of Yuppies
    Jimmy - Jump Into My Mother's Yacht
    Sonoma - Suddenly Overturned Near Old Mainline Access
    Yukon - Yelling Usually Keeps Owners Nonviolent

    Honda - Had One, Never Did Again
    CRV - Crappy Recalled Vehicle / Crying Reveals Victim
    Pilot - Painfully Inadequate Loser Overturns Truck

    Hyundai - Help! Yells Unimpressed Newbie, Disappointed After Introduction
    Santa Fe - Sluggish Automobile Notoriously Tepid And Fools Everyone / Sad Attempt Not Too Advanced,
    Fails Early

    Isuzu - It Slowly Undermines Ziebart's Undercoating
    Amigo - Aliens Might Investigate Grabbing One
    Rodeo - Rides On Dry Earth Only
    Trooper - Towing Recommended Out Of Pitifully Easy Rocks

    Jeep - Just Enough Extra Parts / Jinxed Engine Eats Pistons / Jerks Exploring Every Pasture / Joke
    Electronics Exceptionally Poor / Just Empty Every Pocket
    CJ - Cheap Junk / Children's Jeep / Childish Joke / Claim Jumper
    Grand Cherokee - Grandmother's Ride Allows No Droop; Can't Hear Expensive Radio Over Knocking Engine
    and Exhaust (pic1) (pic2) (pic3)
    Liberty - Laughable Inferior Box Easily Rolls, Terrifying You
    MJ - My Junk / Motor's Junk / Mom's Jeep / Moronic Jerk
    Scrambler - Sad Crawl Ratio Always Makes Boring Life Excitingly Real
    Renegade - Rolls Easily, Negating Emergency Gear And Destroying Everything
    TJ - Tomorrow's Junk / Tow Job / Try Jacking / Transmission Jammed / Total Joke
    Wagoneer - Willfully Atrocious Garbage; Obviously No Engineering Expertise Required
    XJ - Xeno Junk
    YJ - Yesterday's Junk / You Jerk / Yuppy's Jeep
    ZJ - Zero Juice / Zoological Joke

    Kia - Keep It Away / Killed in Action / Know It All (Ayeee!)
    Sportage - Stupid Psychotic Owner Roasts Transmission And Gets Embarrassed

    Land Rover - Laughing At New Driver, Rolled On Very Easy Road
    County - Crazily-Overpriced Unit Normally Taxi's Yokels
    Defender - Driver Easily Forgets Everything; Normally Disabled on Every Rock
    Discovery - Driver Ignorant; Saves Cash to Own a Very Expensive Ride for Yuppies
    Range Rover - Replace All New Gears Eventually; Risk Of Violently Exploding Rear

    Mazda - Mindless Automaton Zipping Dangerously Along
    MPV - Mind Painfully Vacant (pic1) (pic2)
    Navajo - Not A Vehicle A Judge Owns
    Tribute - Terrifying Roll Into Bushes Ultimately Totalled Exterior

    Mercedes - Many Easily Roll & Careen Effortlessly Down Endless Slopes
    ML - More Lift / Money Lost / Moronic Loser
    Unimog - Uncomfortable Noisy Imposing Monstrosity Often Grinds

    Mitsubishi- Mournfully I've Tried Spending Unlimited Bucks; I Still Hate It
    Montero - My Overrated New Truck Easily Rolls Over
    Pajero - Poorly-Assembled Junk; Engine Replaced Often

    Nissan - Now I'm Stuck, Send Another Nissan
    Pathfinder - People Assume These High-Flying Idiots Normally Drive Easy Roads (pic)
    Patrol - Phone A Taxi; Ripped Off Leafs Hardbody - Happy And Retarded Driver Basically Only Delivers
    Yuppies
    Frontier - Foolish Registered Owner Needs To Investigate Engine Replacement

    Subaru - Something Usually Breaks And Renders it Useless
    Brat - Beats Riding A Tricycle
    Outback - Obviously Useless Transmission Breaks; Air Conditioning Kills

    Volvo - Very Old Lady's Vehicle Only

    Willys - We Invariably Like Long Yank Straps / What Incompetent Losers Like, Yes Siree

    Toyota - Tipped Over, Yanked Out To Asphalt
    Highlander - Hopelessly Incompetent Grandpa Hates Lifts And Needs Daily Energy Ration
    Land Cruiser - Lost And Needs Directions, Can't Return Until Idiot Searches Every Road
    RAV4 - Really Awful Valueless 4wheeler
    Tundra - Totally Uncoordinated New Driver Rolls Always

    and last but not the least.......

    Suzuki - Slid Under Zooming Unimog; Killed Instantly
    Grand Vitara - Grossly Restricted Articulation Normally Denotes Very Interesting Time At Rocky Areas
    Samurai - Small Automobile Makes Urinals Really Appear Immense
    Sidekick - Slow Ineffectual Deathtrap Endangers Kin In Collision Knockout
    Geo - Gross Exhaust Odour
    Tracker - Tough Road Action Creates Knocking Engine Rods

  2. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    4,614
    #2
    people have too much time on their hands! :bwahaha:

    wala yatang Hummer H2 ... now that would be nasty!

  3. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    10,603
    #3
    mbt, agree.

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