Strangely, being asked for money, giving in or not to that request, always put you in an awkward situation...Originally Posted by yebo
Damn if you do, Damn if you don't
Out of your control. A Catch 22.
Kaya,- huwag na lang magpautang...
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Hoosier'ed Hotspur
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March 5th, 2013 08:31 AM #1Last edited by CVT; March 5th, 2013 at 08:52 AM.
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Running on Empty...
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March 5th, 2013 09:28 AM #2Discuss it with the wife first and try to set a good timing to ask your mom-in-law, if you decide to collect.
If it's a one time thing then maybe you can write it off but if it becomes habitual and you see the balances increasing, then you better evaluate your stance on lending to her. I've had bad experiences lending to relatives (with my own mom at that!) so I've learned that it's quite important to make sure to draw the line as well. It's good to help when it's really needed but they also have to realize that they cannot fall back on you always and likewise have to be in charge of their own finances.
In the same way, i would not borrow from family unless it's really an important matter and if ever i do, i will make it clear from the onset on when the repayment will be.
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Tsikot Member Rank 2
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March 5th, 2013 10:25 AM #3I got the same experience but we were still going steady, the mom borrowed 25k from me, then after a week or so went to me again for another 25k for a business venture. Then she issued PDCs to me. When the date of maturity came I deposited it one by one, alas, daif. I asked my significant other to help me collect the sum her mom borrowed from me. To cut the long story short, the mom did not bother returning the sum but her daughter paid for it "hulog" system without interest. Indeed a hard lesson learned on my part.
Talk with your wife about this and let her be the one to ask from her mom, that's the best way imo. Good luck.
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Verified Tsikot Member
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March 4th, 2013 04:10 PM #4Nahirap talaga yan ganyan din byenan ko may utang sakin di alam ng wife ko 2years na 10k up to now wala padin bayad mabait naman sya pero di kona lang iniimikan nakakahalata din naman pero hindi pa din nagbabayad hihi
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Darker and Bigger
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March 4th, 2013 06:07 PM #5In laws are family, if they need help then, help them but don't expect them to pay back...write it off...hinde naman malaking amount...but I'm surprised that she went directly to you and hinde sa asawa mo...
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Tsikoteer
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March 4th, 2013 06:50 PM #6i totally understand that naman, like i said ok lang kahit di ako bayaran ang akin lang naman sana kausapin ako. ang usapan kasi namin utang hindi hingi. kasi kahit naman ako dati umuutang sa parents and brothers ko pero pag di ko pa kaya mag bayad sinasabi ko na ma dedelay ako sa pag bayad at kahit sinasabi nila na wag ko na bayaran tulong na lang nila sa akin yon binabayaran ko pa din. yon lang naman gusto ko kausapin ako kung di ako kayang bayaran ano ba naman yung sabihin niya diba. simpleng sabi lang naman na di niya kaya bayaran baka pwede bawi na lang siya next time ganon lang ka dali ok na sa akin. Originally Posted by shadow
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Darker and Bigger
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March 4th, 2013 06:56 PM #7Nahihiya siguro dahil wala pa pangbayad, but I don't agree with others that you need to tell your wife, it's between you and your in law. You lent her the money without her consent better it to stay that way. Originally Posted by foresterx
And the difference is you're blood related to your brother and father, so Kahit papano, there is no shame in telling them you'll get delay paying them back.
And believe me she knows na meron siyang "maling" nagawa by not talking to you. Kung may edad na just let it go...I think she deserve a pass by virtue of being the mom of your wife, remember without her you'll not be married to your wife now
Sent from my iPad using Forum RunnerLast edited by shadow; March 4th, 2013 at 07:03 PM.
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Tsikoteer
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March 4th, 2013 06:56 PM #8^
pwede rin cguro sir pag in case na uutang siya ulit sayo, tell your bienan ung hiniram niyang 40k hindi pa bayad baka may memory gap na. tell her in the nicest way.
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BANNED BANNED BANNED
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March 4th, 2013 09:01 PM #9imho,,,
ang pera, iniimpok/tinitipid/ginagasta/ pero hindi minamahal
ang pera, sana ay hindi pagsimulan ng away lalo nsa sa pamilya- at mas lalo na sa in-laws...
ang pera kinikita-(c0me & go), pero ang relasyon, parang salamin (ingatang magkalamat)
ang pagsasabi ng tapat, pagsasama ng maluwag...
para hindid sumama ang loob mo- huwag mo hanapin ang ugali mo sa iba;
kung ganun ka (kabuti), ang iba hindi...
its (still) better to give than to receive,
believe! ... and it shall return a hundred-fold...
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Tsikoteer
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March 4th, 2013 11:31 PM #10I wish you can still say that kahit inaabuso ka na at binabastos harap harapan bro. Nauunang namamatay ang mga taong sobrang bait. Originally Posted by DBanker
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Hoosier'ed Hotspur
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March 5th, 2013 08:28 AM #11I like what you said bro... Originally Posted by DBanker
Iyon nga lang, may ilang abusado...
I-abot mo ang kamay mo,- hilagpos niya ang buo mong braso.... (tangay pa ang singsing, relo at bracelet mo)... :hysterical:
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Tsikoteer
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March 5th, 2013 03:38 PM #12kung nahihiya ka bypass mo nalang kay father in law ka naman manghiram ng 40k tapos sabihin mo nalang na wag ng sasabihin kay wify mo at kay wify niya kasi pang bibili mo ng regalo sa wifefy mo..
at sure na may makukuha kang pera sa taong nangutang sayo at un ang pambabayad mo sa kanya
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fasterthanyouthink
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Tsikoteer
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March 4th, 2013 11:30 PM #14Yep, in fact nasa family code pa yan. Di ko lang matandaan kung anong article. Hehe. Originally Posted by shadow
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BANNED BANNED BANNED
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March 10th, 2013 07:14 AM #15Takutin mo mother-in-law mo na nambababae ka. It worked for me. yun mother-in-law ko lahat na lang binbayad sa amin, credit card bills, electricit bills, etc. pati 3 consecutvr noche buenas, yun pala inuuwi namin na niluto niya eh eh parang utang na loob, tapos one time, one of her colleauge bought something from my business, she wouldnt let me forget it.
What happened, incidental lang. Siguro mga 3 times umuwi wife ko sa kanila na nag-aaway kami, and so my wife always cry to her na kesyo may babae daw ako etc.
I let it be, and you know what I did i brought my wife to europe, usa, korea, this year, we'll go back to europe again. And my wife maybe expecting new bags. Pamper your wife, makakalimutan nun mga kamag-anak, lalo na mgs kamag-anak nyang user. takot lang ng wife mo bumalik sa ganun buhay, Wife ko empleyado lang dati yun walang maipon kasi puros inuutang ng nanay nya.
Ngaun, halos less contact na kami sa family nya na mangagsmit, pati kapatid nun grabe. Just pamper your wife, and let her know that you hate her family. Dami ko drama pag pumupunta ko sa kanila, sakit tyan ko, may lagnat ako sa wakas nakahalata din wife ko. it's 3 years counting na din, no visits to them sa christmas, sa birthdays, life is so peaceful,
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Pero alam mo kung ano talaga nagpabago sa buhay ko, magmula ng maging fit ako. Maybe because, of that my wife is scared of me na mapunta to someone else, that's why she chose me over her family. And my mother-in-law afraid that her daughter will blame her for losing me. So yun yun, be fit, be marketable. Show them even your loved ones, than you can live without them.
Ako lagi ko sabi sa wife ko, I dream of a life of touring Europe on my own for a year. Basta, nagkarun ng pangyayari na hindi kogusto, sabi ko mawawala na lang ako parang bula, and ill pursue that dream. She knows even in my own family, im not a favorite eh. So Alam nya na kaya kung gawin yun.
the life of love and family, that's as good as on paper, you must have alas all the time.
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pissing gasoline
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Tsikoteer
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March 12th, 2013 05:59 AM #17foresterx, ano nangyari? nasingil mo na MIL mo?
similar din sa akin ito..... bro in law naman nangutang, almost double ng pinautang mo. Nangutang sa amin ng wife ko almost 5 years ago, hanggang ngayon ni Piso hindi nagbabayad. late last year nangungutang ulit, ayoko na..... pasensyahan na lang kami.....
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Tsikoteer
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March 12th, 2013 09:45 AM #18sent her an sms last week, sabi sa akin di pa daw kayang bayaran hulug hulugan na lang daw niya. which is ok to me but the problem is when i went to her house a couple of weeks ago may bagong flat screen tv tapos kung ano ano pang gamit ang bago na di naman kelangan. Originally Posted by jon777
ok lang sana kung talagang nakikita kong gipit kaso pag ganyan na nakikita ko kaya nagigipit kasi kung san san napupunta ang pera parang ang sakit sa loob ko.
Last edited by foresterx; March 12th, 2013 at 10:42 AM.
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Hoosier'ed Hotspur
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March 12th, 2013 09:48 AM #19Iyan ang masaklap bro.,- hindi makabayad sa utang,- pero tuloy ang luho sa buhay.... Originally Posted by foresterx
***t her an sms last week, sabi sa akin di pa daw kayang bayaran hulug hulugan na lang daw niya. which is ok to me but the problem is when i went to her house a couple of weeks ago may bagong flat screen tv tapos kung ano ano pang gamit ang bago na di naman kelangan. ok lang sana kung talagang nakikita kong gipit kaso pag ganyan na nakikita ko kaya nagigipit kasi kung san san napupunta ang pera parang ang sakit sa loob ko.
Hindi mo tuloy maintindihan,- kasi it looks like she is trying to pull a fast one on you.
Hay naku!
OT: Akala ko kung ano na ang ginawa mo...
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Running on Empty...
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March 12th, 2013 09:27 AM #20:party: Originally Posted by tsupermario
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Originally Posted by yebo
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