help.. dad and mom going to separate

[jansky]

there is a tendency that my Mom and dad will soon be separated.
My Dad says that from range 1-10 the love affection is only 4

My mom wont allow this thing to happen

for the past few months it is like my mom is always guarding my dad even the cellphone messages, and always follow to CR ( I mean always asking what is my dad doing in CR) more than 10 times in and out in CR or should i say "always in CR" for no reason.


taking back the history
before they went back here in Philippines last year ( 8 years in US). they have a couple of friends in US which one of the friend is a "SHE" and of course this "she" is already married too. but since my Dad is a sweet type guy, soft speaking guy. they became a close friend which my mom look at they having an affair which there is no proof. then after this event, they went back to here for a good reason. then the family of this friend "she" also went back here, and as a friend they have an open communication they always visit each other. then the jealous thing of my mom is no longer there but of course sometimes they argue over for this matter, but no longer a big issues. then last December they went to beach and my sister invited one of her friend. then this friend of my sister is also somewhat easy to go with type girl "kalog" (married + 1 kid ).
Due to the attitude of this girl (friend of my sister) they became close to each other , sometimes this girl visit my parents house and of course drinking session.

then my mom start a suspicious feeling that they are having affair which my dad is not accepting it.

my dad says that they are just friend no special treatment going on. My dad also said that if this girl has a crush on him, my dad will just be happy and thankful because of his age he still got looks and he will not take advantage on it.


but i havent talked to my mom regarding the "history" why she is on guard today..

my mom already talked to my wife "well of course we know the reason that as a wife only one can understand is a wife".
my mom shared some secret to my wife about that "history".


now my mom eyes is always on tears..

what should i do, what should i say?
I already talked to my sister that this coming weekend there will be event in my place just to cover up things so i can talk to my mom and my sister and on the following day im going to talk to my dad to assess the situation.

your help is highly appreciated i dont want this thing to happen

[ghosthunter]

I suggest your parents to go see a marital counselor. At least a couple of times to see if both parties are still willing to keep the marriage and work on it as well.

It's pointless to trying keeping a marriage if one party does not feel like staying.

Words from personal experience.

[jansky]

considering they area already pass 60 of age

[alwayz_yummy]

i agree marriage councilor first.. but in the end, let them be.. kung di na sila matuto pang magsama pa, let them go on separate ways.. pero as you as child, iinsist mo parin rights mo. wala kang kakampihan, wala kang pag-tataniman ng galit to either of them.kung di sila matuto ibaba ang pride nila, e sad to say, di na pwede yan maayos. kasi di na makikinig yan sa isat-isa.

we all want a 1 big happy family. pero kung magkakasam nga sila, lagi naman bulyawan, a nakow, much better pa to let them be.

you ang magagawa mo nalang is, nakita mo na mali nila, wag mo na ulitin.

lakas mo magsalita noh.. sanay na ako, mahigit 5 years na,e... basta i know they're my parents, and ako parin panganay nila.....

[ghosthunter]

considering they area already pass 60 of age

So what if they are past age 60. Would you prefer if they start sleeping in separate rooms and going out without the other?

[jansky]

oopss.. sorry i did not mention that im also married na rin so im no longer a child heheheh
anyway back to topic po tau

[safeorigin]

well, if you want them to not separate then you would do everything in your power to prevent that from happening. go hire a marriage consultant.

you might even want to seclude them somewhere with no cellphones and such. then go pick them after a few days

[willvill]

Just tell you mom that she let them be. They will just get tired soon anyway and things will become as normal again. Just my 2 cents.

[jansky]

my dad is irritated to my mom's presence and my mom is suspicious

yesterday i got update from my wife, she said that my mom is letting it go for a moment and having a past time with some old friends

[CVT]

Anything can break up anytime. Even if they're together for a long time.

Have they considered joining a religious social organization like Couples For Christ or Marriage Encounter? I am not a member of any of these groups but I know a husband and wife from the former organization whose marriage life was enriched because of their vocation through this organization....

I think your father should distance himself from your sister's friend, who may be looking for a father figure, and who knows. Worse, he/they should not be having drinking sessions with her.
7303:soda: