Having a Baby Before Marriage! Still a Big Deal?

[shadow]

Call me conservative, old timer whatever. I'm against having a baby before marriage for the following reasons.

1. I don't want it to happen to my daughter nor will i tolerate my son.

2. I value the sanctity of marriage. (old timer talaga). For me if a girl is worth carrying my child or our child, she's worth marrying before having a baby.

3. I have a pamangkin who has a little girl out of wedlock. The little girl is now 4 yrs. old and is questioning her mom why she doesn't have a middle name. (The mother named the child after her because my pamangkin did not marry her.)

What others may say or even relatives may say should not be the reason for getting married. The only reason that matters is that you both love each other and you are willing to take that sacred vow to love each other till death do you part (Matanda na talaga ako ). If you are not ready to make that commitment then don't get married.

+1 although I don't really care kung ginagawa ng iba..but for any of my lady family members, I won't allow it.....first prang if a man asked a lady to live with him instead na yayain magpaksasal parang hinde niya talaga mahal yun girl or hinde niya nirerespeto...for me laging disadvantage sa babae ang living in...

kung mahal mo pakasalan mo.... no pun to the TS

[Honda97]

just like the others, i don't want to come down as judgmental. but since you asked for my opinion, here it is:

i'm basically a live ad let live kind of guy. but if you've been with your girlfriend for 5 years now, maybe you should start thinking about marriage. it appears that you are at that stage of commitment anyway.

kung hindi pa buntis, i'd still encourage you to get married first before having a baby.

confirmed na ba that your gf is pregnant? if so, then the proper attitude for relatives and anyone else for that matter is one of support at this stage because that's what your gf will need a lot of.

oo nga pala... if your gf is pregnant, congratulations!

[XTO]

It’s about time for you both to realized what you’ve been doing…… if “that” didn’t happen, you won’t even start thinking about the possibility of marriage right? like you said you’re both matured enough and professional and are so willing to take her to church… talk about it seriously with your gf, what’s her plan? And yours? show them (her relatives) what your stand on that. IMO consider a civil wedding first – for the sake of the incoming baby. That way walang tsismis.

[juntzo]

Actually we have plans to get married by May next year. But now i think she will have second thoughts of wearing a wedding gown with a big tummy!
Anyway we still have to talk about it more!

hehehe... my last post was buried!

[HIFI]

What you have done cannot be undone na. Big deal, small deal is no longer relevant. Nandiyan na.

If I'm your dad, I will say go ahead marry her, if you feel she's the one.

It is supposed to be every parent's dream for their children to start a family of their own, especially pag kaya na - mentally, physically, and financially.

May big dreams ba ang parents mo to marry you off to some rich gal of their choosing?

[Cult Zero]

Congratz juntzo! My vote -> It's okay for me! Live and let live.

Is it just me or are we experiencing another Baby Boom?

[LadyRider]

hehehe... my last post was buried!

Good day Sir Juntzo, I know where you're coming from and I feel your sentiments. Siguro pinaka maganda magpa check-up muna gf mo kung sure na buntis na sya. And if she is pregnant, plan na kayo ng sasabihin sa relatives nya.

Sir, it pays to be honest naman kaya kung sakaling ganun nga, sabihin na lang ang totoo. Tama yung sinabi ng iba na ang galit ay pansamantala lang. Pag labas ng bata, lahat ng yan mawawala na.

Siguro nga its high time for you and your partner to think about settling down. Tutal 5 years naman na kayo eh and as you said, you are of the right age.

My question na lang Sir, "Are you sure about this girl you're living-in with?" "Do you see her being with you for the rest of your life?" If yes, then why not marry her na? She deserves it din naman diba?

[juntzo]

Good day Sir Juntzo, I know where you're coming from and I feel your sentiments. Siguro pinaka maganda magpa check-up muna gf mo kung sure na buntis na sya. And if she is pregnant, plan na kayo ng sasabihin sa relatives nya.

Sir, it pays to be honest naman kaya kung sakaling ganun nga, sabihin na lang ang totoo. Tama yung sinabi ng iba na ang galit ay pansamantala lang. Pag labas ng bata, lahat ng yan mawawala na.

Siguro nga its high time for you and your partner to think about settling down. Tutal 5 years naman na kayo eh and as you said, you are of the right age.

My question na lang Sir, "Are you sure about this girl you're living-in with?" "Do you see her being with you for the rest of your life?" If yes, then why not marry her na? She deserves it din naman diba?

There is no question about our commitment to each other! As i said we have already a plan (although not definite yet!) to get married. This is just being complicated by her being pregnant. My issue is about her fears about her relatives. I'm ready to face it though don't get me wrong. I'm just annoyed that this is still a big deal in our day and age!

[HIFI]

I voted: Okay for me but will consider my relatives' approval.

Respeto sa magulang. I'm sure they will approve. After all, independent ka na.

[badsekktor]

for me it doesn't matter if you are married or not as long as you would not neglect your responsibilities to the kid but there will be things that you would need to consider. Are you and your partner willing to accept the consequences (like being branded or whatsoever). Are you willing to put the child in a situation where he/she would be branded.

The only problem that i see would be issues regarding legalities and everything that comes with it. (like sa tax exemptions, benefits, dependents etc....)