Joke Time!

[JR318]

An engineer died. He was taken to heaven. However, later on, it was realized that there was a mistake and he would have to be sent to hell.

Engineer was not happy with the living condition of hell. He started working on infrastructure. He erected great buildings, installed ACs in rooms, water supply, hygiene, and life in hell became really exciting.

One day, St Peter called up Satan and asked how life was going on in hell. Satan: "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

St Peter said, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

Satan: "What nonsense." I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

St Peter said, "Satan, you have to understand that, send him to heaven or I will sue you"

Satan laughed uproariously and replied, "We have all the lawyers here!"

[robgowild]

[robgowild]

[robgowild]

[Monseratto]

[12vdc]

A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. Suddenly the horse falls into a mud hole and starts sinking. He tells the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The chicken runs to the farmer, but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's Mercedes back to the hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend and drives forward saving the horse from sinking.

A few days later, the chicken and horse are playing in the meadow again, and the chicken falls into a mud hole. The chicken tells the horse to go and get some help from the farmer.
The horse says: "I think I can get you out."
So he stretches over the width of the hole and says: "Grab hold of my 'thing' and pull yourself up."
The chicken does this and is pulled to safety.

Moral of the story: If you are hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks

[Monseratto]

[jodski]

Loyalty Tests…

Test 1:
Wife buys 12 underwears of the same color for hubby..

Hubby: Why same color sweetheart. people will think I never change my underwear.

Wife: who are they?

silence…

Test 2:

A couple sees a hot girl..

Wife: So big, aren’t they?

Husband: Yes

Wife: Are they artificial?

Husband: I think natural.

Wife: Earrings? Natural??

silence...
.

[Monseratto]

Moms know best..

[Monseratto]