unleashing it
several times, i've written about my dad always being in the hospital.
but i guess i really haven't discussed why he's always there.
well..
my dad has SCLERODERMA. sclero means HARDENING, derma means SKIN.
scleroderma therefore is hardening of the skin.
it is INCURABLE.
no one knows what CAUSED the disease.
it is VERY RARE. it is the female gender who primarily gets it..but still, it is rare.
his doctor gave him 4 years to live since his diagnosis.. (1996-2000)
it's 2005, he's had it for the last 9 years.
there are lots of scleroderma types, those that affects the internal organs and those that do not.
my dad's lungs got affected and it made the struggle harder..
my dad's struggling. and so are we.
he's having a hard time eating now.
even the few he eats, he vomits.
he's so thin now. literally skin and bones..
he hasn't had a decent sleep for the past years..
if he can't sleep, it means that one of us should not sleep so that that person can watch over daddy.
he can't breathe well. he's breathing with the help of his oxygen tank, 24/7!
he consumes at least 4 big tanks of oxygen in a day.
he's experiencing the RAYNAUD'S PHENOMENON wherein he feels excessive coldness in his feet..how cold? dad says it's like his feet's soaked in super duper iced cold water.
i know that my dad does not have much time left. but my whole family's doing all our best to take care of him. massaging his skin, or making him warm when he's feeling cold. if he needs to regulate his oxygen, we'll do it happily for him. our patience have gone past the philippine borders. my dad's just so amazing for keeping up with the disease for the past 9 years that whatever he needs to keep holding on, we'll be beside him...ALL THE WAY.