Hey guys, here's some advice

[doriftospeed]

Hey guys, here's some advice

1. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say "could be better." This will keep her on her toes and girls love that.

2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. Or, if she grabs your hand, squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.

3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.

4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is, say "you better be." Repeat this four or five times until morning. This will show her you care.

5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement and every girl needs some improvement.

6. Recognize the small things... they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them because jewelry is for pussies.

7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "**** you," and grab the other girl's ass. Girls love competition.

8. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick." Women love those special nicknames.

9. Take her to a party. When you get there, she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

10. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls?

11. If you care about her never, ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

12. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy.

13. Give her one of your t-shirts... and make sure it has your smell on it. Not a ***y cologne smell, but a bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.

14. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

15. If you're listening to music and she asks to hear it, tell her "no." This way she'll think you're mysterious.

16. Remember her birthday but don't get her anything. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps you happy and your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

17. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day, leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much, but I think it's funny.

18. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will, promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call.

19. Next time you are having ***, make sure you get off before she does, then get off her and leave. Girls love that.

[GlennSter]

huh? you call that advice? i hope you are kidding bro.

[Jun aka Pekto]

What's the advice for, again?

[redorange]

From your advice it sounds like you're single w/o a girlfriend. LOL Honestly though I read this some place before you posted it here.

[doriftospeed]

huh? you call that advice? i hope you are kidding bro.

No, Im serious

From your advice it sounds like you're single w/o a girlfriend. LOL Honestly though I read this some place before you posted it here.

au contraire, lol. but i get the joke

[nugundam93]

my ex loved #14. no kidding.

[n2knee]

Hey guys, here's some advice

1. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say "could be better." This will keep her on her toes and girls love that.

2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. Or, if she grabs your hand, squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.

3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.

4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is, say "you better be." Repeat this four or five times until morning. This will show her you care.

5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement and every girl needs some improvement.

6. Recognize the small things... they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them because jewelry is for pussies.

7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "**** you," and grab the other girl's ass. Girls love competition.

8. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick." Women love those special nicknames.

9. Take her to a party. When you get there, she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

10. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls?

11. If you care about her never, ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

12. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy.

13. Give her one of your t-shirts... and make sure it has your smell on it. Not a ***y cologne smell, but a bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.

14. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

15. If you're listening to music and she asks to hear it, tell her "no." This way she'll think you're mysterious.

16. Remember her birthday but don't get her anything. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps you happy and your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

17. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day, leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much, but I think it's funny.

18. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will, promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call.

19. Next time you are having ***, make sure you get off before she does, then get off her and leave. Girls love that.

:lol: :lol:

[oldblue]

#16 sounds like a parable

[ARB]

advice how to make your current GF or wife to be your ex!

[Chip]

galing ata to sa The Man Show
lol