A Disturbance in the Force: tsikoteers endorse Khaos super-device

[mbt]

It may be really surprising, but mazdamazda, carlocaraddict, and I now officially endorse the khaos super-duper-mega-hyper contraption that's been causing much constipated anguish in the boards lately (see photos later).

surprising? shocking? certainly, especially since mazdamazda has come to be known as an unbelievably anal oxides of nitrogen eco-warrior in the face of the khaos controversy. but lo and behold, the three of us took a field trip to a khaos booth and we are now believers (as the ateneo mantra goes).

it has come to our heat-addled attention, after a rather underwhelming drive in a chic Peugeot 206 pocket roadster, that khaos has passed australian federal standard testing and in fact, also received praise from the US Environmental Protection Agency, with independent federal testing confirming that indeed, all significant particulate emissions, including nitrogen dioxide, nitric oxide, and nitrous oxide, are demonstrably reduced with the employment of the miracle wonder-thingy and that there were significant gains in fuel economy, on the order of 14%. although the fuel economy gain falls short of the claimed 50-or-so percent reduction, that is still a significant reduction, especially if employed on a massive scale. a twice-interrupted time-series experimental design was used on six vehicles of various types and sizes: a 2004 Honda Civic subcompact, a 2004 Ford F-150 pickup, a 2003 Ford Explorer SUV, a Ferrari 612 Scaglietti sports car, a 2003 Toyota Camry sedan, and a 2004 Nissan Patrol - which rather curiously, the photo shows to have a license plate reading 'ODS888'. on both times when the device was installed, controlled testing showed reduced volumes of particulate emissions and improved fuel economy. this is remarkable because the device proves to be a viable even for modern EFI vehicles. a third independent laboratory confirmed the results with a line spectra analysis of the exhaust gases through NMR spectroscopy. although the NMR spectrometer and the instruments of the EPA were all unplugged during the time of testing the khaos device, the EPA affirmed that the results were generally conclusive and has significant implications for air pollution control.

a technical paper was appended to the EPA report, and a careful, though declassified, analysis of the workings of the device was presented. it seems that the interior of the metal tube (which was presented here as just that - an unremarkable metal tube) is impregnated at the molecular level with a novel, patent-pending, trimethyl-octane-deuterium-palladium-matrix catalyst (sort of similar to high-tech Euro VI downstream catalytic converters) that somehow promotes better fuel utilization and more complete combustion, pre-ignition. the EPA notes that this is the first device of its type to pass strict testing.

The manufacturers of khaos are now finalizing a deal with the United Save-the-Kalesa Alliance, a local group dedicated to the preservation of the horse-drawn carriage in Manila, to equip all the horses of members of the alliance with the khaos device. already, at least two horses which have the device implanted with a biochemical adhesive into their lower gastro-intestinal tracts, just before the rectum, demonstrated significantly reduced emissions and combustion byproducts. another horse which has one khaos device stuck up each of its nostrils also demonstrated reduced harmful emissions. this proves that the khaos device is effective when installed pre-combustion chamber or post-combustion chamber, which means that it is also a miracle catalytic converter substitute.

we support (photos attached).

sincerely,

mazdamazda, carlocaraddict, and mbt

(editor's note: the editor is not responsible for the integrity of this communique or the honesty of the author. all violent reactions will be promptly forwarded to the Have A Sense of Humor Department of tsikot.com)

[alwayz_yummy]

were's the photo?..i wanna see it...i to could be drawn to the dork...i mean dark side..

[GlennSter]

speak in english please!hjhrehrehrr

mukha ngang tapos na thesis mo ah...kaya kung anu anong kalokohan na naman ang ginagawa at sinusulat mo...herhehrehr

alwayz yummy,,,please read again...

[carlocaraddict]

pics

[ghosthunter]

pics

parang alam ko kung saan ito ah!

[alwayz_yummy]

ok yan.........um....


which side are we talking about?kinda lost...

"who do i ask for help when i dont know which way to go :question: "

[mbt]

yes, we have moved over to the Dork Side.

[GlennSter]

alwyaz yummy..it's just a joke...nabasa mo ba yunbg article?

[alwayz_yummy]

yes sir,i've read it to...."naki-ride" din po..hehehe..

[kingkaboodles]

ahahaha!

[mbt]

glennster,

anong joke???? serious kami ha

[ILuvDetailing]

Magkano ba binayad ni Mr. Planas sa inyo?

[pissword]

hahahaha...

[GlennSter]

fine fin..serious na kung serious..

always yummy..pa ride narin!!

[zechs]

"for endorsing khaos turbo super charger device, the three of them gets free KSTC on their cars including installation! and! another 50% discount if they will purchase and install another unit!!" --Mr. Planas :lol:

[mbt]

ILuvdetailing,

wala, pero nanlibre si carlocaraddict ng anim na gonuts donuts bwahahahahaa

zechs,

yes, actually, bumili ako ng tatlo... yung dalawa sinaksak ko sa cr-v (if one is good, two must be better diba???), yung isa, nilagay ko sa Land Cruiser II nila otep HAHAHAAA :D

ghosthunter,

GADDAM you should have seen the faces of the khaos people while we were having our little pictorial... ang sasama ng tingin nila sa amin ata hahahahaaaa

[ghosthunter]

ghosthunter,

GADDAM you should have seen the faces of the khaos people while we were having our little pictorial... ang sasama ng tingin nila sa amin ata hahahahaaaa

I would have loved to be there to see those faces... maybe they are thinking I was among you guys too? I wonder... :D

[mazdamazda]

I would have loved to be there to see those faces... maybe they are thinking I was among you guys too? I wonder... :D

hahaha... they were eyeing us from the start... :D

a guy was almost about to approach us, but we were already leaving to check out the Hummers.

[carlocaraddict]

muwahaahhahaha!

[kiper]

akala ko mayroon na akong mababaril ng di oras..

walangya ka MBT..haha that was a nice one!