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  1. Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    2,760
    #3301
    Classic natin


  2. Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Posts
    1,346
    #3302
    Quote Originally Posted by jodski View Post
    Classic natin

    Sana yan nag nagamit sa mamasapano


    sana yan ang nagamit sa mamasapano

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by jodski View Post
    Classic natin

    Sana yan nag nagamit sa mamasapano


    sana yan ang nagamit sa mamasapano

  3. Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    454
    #3303
    Quote Originally Posted by jodski View Post
    Classic natin

    Wala pala di FPJ dito eh. Kalahating bala ka lang.

  4. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,569
    #3304
    A very rich married man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

    The man not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, told the Italian woman he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. And If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.

    The Italian woman was skeptical but she agreed, she then asked how he would know when the baby was born.
    To keep it discreet, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write ‘Spaghetti’ on the back. And once he got the postcard he would then arrange for the child support to begin.

    One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife. ‘Sweetie, she said, ‘you received a very strange post card today from Italy.’

    ‘Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,’ he said.

    The wife said ok and then watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

    On the card was written: Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without. Send extra sauce.

  5. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,569
    #3305
    I love my nothing box...

    Last edited by Monseratto; February 27th, 2015 at 11:16 AM.

  6. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,569
    #3306
    A nun walking home, badly needed to use to the bathroom, but nothing was open except the local Hooters, so she walked in.

    The place was packed and it was hopping with music and loud conversations and every once in a while ‘the lights would turn off.’ Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.

    However, when they saw the nun, the room went silent, so silent that you could hear a pin drop. The nun walked up to the bartender, and asked, ‘Sir, may I please use the restroom?

    The bartender replied, ‘Sure thing, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.” Well, in that case, I’ll just look the other way,’ said the nun. So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.

    After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause.

    She went to the bartender and said, ‘Sir, I don’t understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?’

    Well, now everyone knows you’re one of us,’ said the bartender, ‘Would you like a drink?’ ‘No thank you, but, I still don’t understand,’said the confused nun.

    ‘You see,’ laughed the bartender, ‘every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

    A nun walking home, badly needed to use to the bathroom, but nothing was open except the local Hooters, so she walked in.

    The place was packed and it was hopping with music and loud conversations and every once in a while ‘the lights would turn off.’ Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.

    However, when they saw the nun, the room went silent, so silent that you could hear a pin drop. The nun walked up to the bartender, and asked, ‘Sir, may I please use the restroom?

    The bartender replied, ‘Sure thing, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.” Well, in that case, I’ll just look the other way,’ said the nun. So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.

    After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause.

    She went to the bartender and said, ‘Sir, I don’t understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?’

    Well, now everyone knows you’re one of us,’ said the bartender, ‘Would you like a drink?’ ‘No thank you, but, I still don’t understand,’said the confused nun.

    ‘You see,’ laughed the bartender, ‘every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?

  7. Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    38,655
    #3307

    ^ ^ ^ That's cool!

    I remember a bar and grill restaurant abroad, where one of the urinals in the men's room is typically left vacant for some reason... Makes a newcomer who is answering the call of nature wonder, but nevertheless grabs the opportunity... tipsy tipsy tipsy....

    Because everyone would have a front view of you urinating in all your splendor.... :hysterical:

    And when you exit the toilet,- the crowd would be cheering for your "live performance"....

    Take a bow!....


    "The measure of a man is what he does with power" LJIOHF!

    25.8K:shazam:

  8. Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    298
    #3308

  9. Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Posts
    2,543
    #3309
    kapag mabilis tumakbo ang pogi ay nag jojoging lang daw pero kapag pangit naman snatcher!!! asan ang katarungan dyan...

  10. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,569
    #3310
    When John and Mary first got married John said, “I am a *** addict and I’m putting a box under the bed to help control my addiction. You must promise never to look in it.”

    In all their 30 years of marriage Mary never looked. However, on the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box were 3 empty beer cans and $81,874.25 in cash. She closed the box and put it back under the bed. Now that she knew what was in the box, she was doubly curious as to why there even was such a box with such contents.

    That evening they were out for a special Anniversary dinner. After dinner Mary could no longer contain her curiosity and she confessed, saying, “I am so sorry. For all these years I kept my promise and never looked into the box under our bed. However, today the temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know why do you keep the 3 beer cans in the box?”

    John thought for a while and said, “I guess after all these years you deserve to know the truth. Whenever I was unfaithful to you I put an empty beer can in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it again.”

    Mary was shocked, but said, “Hmmm, Jennifer, Paula and Monica. I am very disappointed and saddened by your behavior. However since you are addicted to ***, I guess it does happen and I guess 3 times is not that bad considering your problem.”

    John thanked her for being so understanding. They hugged and made their peace.

    A little while later Mary asked John, so why do you have all that money in the box?

    John answered; “Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans, I took them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash”

Joke Time!