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  1. Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    3,002
    #3231
    A priest was about to finish his tour of duty, and was leaving his Mission in the jungle where he has spent years teaching the natives, when he realises that the one thing he never taught them was how to speak English.
    So he takes the chief for a walk in the forest. He points to a tree and says to the chief

    "This is a tree."

    The chief looks at the tree and grunts "Tree."

    The Priest is pleased with the response.

    They walk a little further and he points to a rock and says

    "This is a rock."

    Hearing this, the chief looks and grunts "Rock."

    The Priest was really getting enthusiastic about the results when he hears a rustling in the bushes.

    As they peek over the top, he sees a couple of natives in the midst of heavy ***ual activity..

    The Priest is really flustered and quickly responds, "Man riding a bike."

    The chief looks at the couple briefly, pulls out his blowgun and kills them.

    The Priest goes ballistic and yells at the chief that he has spent years teaching the tribe how to be civilized and be kind to each other, so how could he kill these people in cold blood that way?

    The chief replied, "My bike"...!!!!!


  2. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,586
    #3232

  3. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,586
    #3233
    ET's finger hit the jackpot...


  4. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,586
    #3234

  5. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,586
    #3235

  6. Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Posts
    337
    #3236
    A man 80 years of age married a young lady. A year later he carried her to the hospital, and she had a baby. The nurse said to the man:"At your age, how do you do that?"

    The man answered, "You just have to keep the motor running."

    Another year passes, and the man carries her back to the hospital, another baby. The same nurses said to the man and asked: 'You are something else, how do you do that?"

    He said,"I told you that you just have to keep the motor running". Another year and back tot he hospital for another baby. The same nurse said:"You are unbelievable, how do you do that?!"

    He said:"You go to keep that motor running."

    She answered:"Well, you better change oil, because this one came out black."

  7. Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Posts
    337
    #3237
    An engineer died. He was taken to heaven. However, later on, it was realized that there was a mistake and he would have to be sent to hell.

    Engineer was not happy with the living condition of hell. He started working on infrastructure. He erected great buildings, installed ACs in rooms, water supply, hygiene, and life in hell became really exciting.

    One day, St Peter called up Satan and asked how life was going on in hell. Satan: "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

    St Peter said, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

    Satan: "What nonsense." I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

    St Peter said, "Satan, you have to understand that, send him to heaven or I will sue you"

    Satan laughed uproariously and replied, "We have all the lawyers here!"

  8. Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Posts
    341
    #3238

  9. Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Posts
    341
    #3239

  10. Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Posts
    341
    #3240

Joke Time!