Is honesty always the best policy re adopted child?

**pissword** · January 19th, 2004 09:31 AM

yeapp dapat malaman ng bata, specially eh kung kamag anak lang naman. but for me mas ok kung elementary years palang siya sabihin na pero syempre same treatment...

and also mas maganda ata pag adopted un bata siya lang mag isa... pag may tunay na anak medyo malaki talaga chance na may conflict. maiinsecure kahit na same lang ang turing sa kanila, feeling nya ndi sya ganun ka mahal pa din.

**Ungas** · January 19th, 2004 09:37 AM

Di kaya pag umpisahan ng pagiging problem child yan pag sinabi nyo agad pre-teen-age years? Magiging rebelde and as PK pointed out, "ako kalaban ang mundo".

**pajerokid** · January 19th, 2004 09:38 AM

Baka kasi madevelop ng inferiority comply when told too young.

**IceColdBeer** · January 19th, 2004 10:54 AM

For me no need to tell kasi when you adopted the child, you actually accepted him/her to be like your own, so I don't see a point to tell it pa. Kung malaman man nung bata as they grow up, eh aaminin ko naman, but I would tell him/her that being adopted is no different from my own kids as the fact that I adopted him/her means that I acknowledge them to be my own family.

**kimpOy** · January 19th, 2004 11:27 AM

the child has the right to know, when, case to case
you'll know if the child is mature enough to take the news.

**pissword** · January 19th, 2004 11:40 AM

yeapp case to case nga siguro, may kilala ako elementary palang sya now, alam nya na adopted sya. and halata naman kasi never din nabuntis un nanay nya hehe i mean un nagpapalaki sa kanya now..pero wala lang sa kanya, walang problem. pero kasi nag iisa palang sya, i think magkakaron lang ng problem pag may tunay na anak na... mukhang inferiority complex nga kalalabasan

**mbt** · January 19th, 2004 11:46 AM

baka nga mas ok kung sabihin sa bata when around 10-12 years old siya (okay, baka nga not a good idea yung during teenage years hehehe). ganun ata yung usual age based sa adoption study na ginawa ko sa skul dati. the reason: telling it in adulthood may shatter the self-image and self-identity of the person, which by adulthood e nabuo na. baka maging mahirap, especially by that time ay actively engaged in relationships yung tao. more or less ganun din for the turbulent teenage years

at least kung bata pa, the child will probably not be as affected by the news, and may actually find it easier to adapt kesa kung at a later age pa sinabi. and practically, at this age ay maliit ang risk na siryosong magrerebelde o maglalayas o magsusuicide yung bata hehehe