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  1. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    665
    #41
    e yung taghiyawat.

    Inalok ni Boy Bastos ng mani si Nene, sabi ni Nene

    Ayoko dahil TINITIGYAWAT AKO SA MANI .

    (grabe yun)

  2. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    10,942
    #42
    I went to a psychiatrist because I was having severe problems with my *** life. The psychiatrist asked me a lot of questions, but didn't seem to be getting a clear picture of my problems.
    Finally he asked, "Do you ever watch your girlfriend's face while you're having ***?"

    "Well, yes, I did once."

    "Well, how did she look?"

    "Oh boy,... she looked VERY angry!"

    At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere and he said, "Well that's very interesting, we must look into this further. Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your girlfriend's face once during ***; that seems somewhat unusual; how did it occur that you saw her face that time?"

    "She was watching her sister and me through the window."

  3. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    10,603
    #43
    A man joins a nudist colony and on his first day he strips and wanders around. A gorgeous blonde walks by, and the man gets a stiffy. The woman notices his erection and says, "Did you call me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "It's a rule here that if you get an erection it implies you called for me." Smiling, she lies down and lets him have his way with her. The man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sits down, he farts. A huge, hairy man lumbers toward him, "Did you call for me?" he says. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "It's a rule that if you fart, it implies you called for me." The huge man spins him around and has his way with him. The newcomer staggers back to the office where he yells, "You can keep the $500 membership fee, I'm outta here!" "But, sir," states the receptionist, "you've only been here for a few hours." The man replies, "Listen, lady, I'm 68, I only get an erection once a month, but I fart 15 times a day - I'm gone!"

  4. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    10,603
    #44
    A young girl confesses she's pregnant. "Bring me the pig who did this to you!" her mum screams. The girl quickly makes a phone call and soon after a Ferrari pulls up. Out steps a distinguished gentleman, handsome and impeccably dressed. He sits down in the living room. "Good afternoon," he greets the family. "Your daughter has told me of the situation. I'm unable to marry her but I'll take full responsibility. If it's a girl, I'll bequeath her three shops, two town houses, and a $1 million bank account. If it's a boy, my legacy will be a factory and a $2 million account. If it's twins, two factories and $500K each. However, if there's a miscarriage..." The father, breaking his silence, places a hand on the man's shoulder: "You'll pork her again, right?"

  5. Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    1,140
    #45
    Joke # 1
    Virgin male on his honeymoon phoned his mom asking what to do.
    MOM: Put your biggest thing on her hairiest thing.
    SON: OK. I got my nose in her armpit. Now what?

    Joke # 2
    OLD MAN: Can you give me an erection?
    FAITH HEALER: I can make the blind see, make the lame walk and I
    can even cure cancer, but I'm sorry I cannot raise the dead.

    Joke # 3
    2 employees were caught naked and having *** in the office by the
    guard.

    GUARD: Aha! Violating company rules!
    MAN: What rule?
    GUARD: Not wearing uniforms.

    Joke # 4
    Q: What is the difference between Biology and Sociology?
    A: If the baby looks like the father, that is biology. If he
    looks like the neighbor, that's sociology.

    Joke # 5
    Q: Define Impotence?
    A: It's nature's way of saying "NO HARD FEELINGS"

    Joke # 6
    A husband was asked: Do you talk to you wife after ***?
    His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone.

    Joke # 7
    At the movie house.
    GIRL: Honey, the man beside me is masturbating.
    BF: just ignore him dear.
    GIRL: I can't. He's using my hand!!

    Joke # 8
    Q: Why was the 2 piece bikini invented?
    A: To separate the meat section from the dairy section.

    Joke # 9
    Boy 1: why did you run away from the naked lady?
    Boy 2: because my mom said that if I look at a naked lady I will
    turn to stone, and a part of me was already getting hard!!

    Joke # 10
    A camel and an elephant met.
    The elephant asked the camel
    Why do u have your breasts on your back?
    The camel clearly irritated by the outrage of modesty replies ..
    What a silly question from someone who has a thingy on his face!

  6. Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Posts
    131
    #46
    pinoy jokes:

    Nanay: anak, sabihin mo kay daddy hilutin ako!
    Anak(bulol): dady, day, iyutin mo daw ti mami
    Tatay: sabihin mo sa mommy mo wala ako sa mood
    Anak: mami, wala daw tamud ti dadi.

  7. Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Posts
    746
    #47
    Q: what do you call a female ghost's organ?
    A: Spooky!

    Conversations of a senior citizen couple:
    Babae: Alam mo, kahit 55 yrs. na tayong kasal nagiinit pa rin ang dibdib ko sa iyo.
    Lalaki: Paanong hindi magiinit ang dibdib mo e nakasawsaw na sa kape yung suso mo.

  8. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    665
    #48
    bump :eviltongu

  9. Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    1,632
    #49
    ERAP Joke...

    On the first day of Grade 4, ERAP's math teacher asked the students to count to 50. Many of them did very well, some getting as high as 37. But ERAP did extremely well; he made it to 100 with only 3 mistakes. At home he told his Dad how well he had done.

    Dad told him, "That's because you're an ESTRADA, son."

    The next day, in English class, the teacher asked students to recite the alphabet. Some made it to the letter "K" with only one mistake but ERAP outdid them again. He made it all the way through, missing only the letter "M".

    That evening he once again told his Dad the good news and Dad explained to him, "That's because you're an ESTRADA, son."

    The next day, the boys were dressing up after Physical Education. ERAP noted that, compared to his classmates, he seemed overly "well-endowed". This confused him.

    That night, he asked his Dad, "Dad, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is much bigger than theirs. Is that because I'm an ESTRADA?" "No, son," explained Dad, "kasi 10 years old pa lang sila at ikaw eh 18 na!"

  10. Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    2,421
    #50
    tagal na pla to! hehehe. had a good laugh!

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