The Great Dilemma of Pinoys Abroad

[architect]

In line with the ICT scholarship program of my Rotary Club, where we teach website (HTML) design, Intro courses, Autocad, and JAVA to public high school seniors and where the top graduates are recruited to work part time, I get to interview the top graduates.

One thing that strikes me is that almost all, especially the female students, are willing to sacrifice their future just so that they can help out their families financially. They are willing to forego scholarships and promising futures to take on dead-end jobs, even seedy ones (GRO, japayuki, etc.) just so their parents can continue being jobless.

And almost all of those who end up working part time (while they go to college) are pressured to stop their education since they are already earning money. Hence we have a requirement that they should be enrolled full time in order to remain in our program.

In my frustration, I started teaching our scholars to be selfish. Time and again I make them realize that unless they secure their future first, the cycle of poverty will continue on, as they will grow up to depend on their kids who will have to sacrifice their own future, and so on...

Just as importantly, we started rejected applicants who show an unwillingness not to sacrifice their future. Harsh as it may sound, we also check on their family backgrounds to determine whether they will be fully supported or they will be pressured once they start earning while still in college. Obviously we reject those we think their families will depend on them.

The dilemma persists because it is a two-way street. There are takers simply because there are givers. And human nature is such that we tend to ask for a foot when given an inch.

So how do we solve the dilemma? Until someone comes up with a better solution, we are trying – one person at a time. It may not be much – but to our scholars, it often means the difference between having no chances at all and a good chance for a brighter future. And hopefully when they grow up to become successful individuals they can educate others.

[tsupermario]

pardon me but i can't seem to reconcile your point that "it often means the difference between having no chances at all and a good chance for a brighter future," with your earlier statement that you started rejecting applicants who are not willing to not sacrifice their future. ("we started rejected applicants who show an unwillingness not to sacrifice their future....")

surely if the unselfish applicant made it abroad, the battle is at least half won isn't it?

[118designs]

I think it all boils down to the Filipino culture of families being closely knit.Where else could u see siblings already with their own families still living in one roof?As compared to the US iregardless of your families financial position its already a known fact that when your 18 you should hae your own job and you should be paying the bills etc.

The positive side about it is it shows our love for family,respect for elders etc. every christmas, new year, vacation-cousins sleep over, we have a vacation at lolas house in the province, family gatherings,etc.etc. But the negative side of it is what has been discussed throughout this thread is lazy relatives depending on relatives working abroad.

We should share our wealth but to a certain point and not the point wherein relatives are always expecting something when you get back and become dependent.

Theres also a miscconception amongst common Filipinos about landing a job abroad would mean big bucks.True your salary is maybe 4-5 times than what you earn here.But..what u spend there is also 4-5 times what you spend here.The cost of living broad is also higher. The relatives who compute the salary of the ofw into pesos should also compute the expenses to pesos.

And not everyone working abroad does not have very good living conditions. I have friends whose parents have been in the states a long time nice house,nice cars its because theyve been there for ages and they brought some money with them when they left manila. But on the other hand i also saw the houses of people living in filipino communities in the US small cramped with relatives same story here.They even havent seen vegas or new york or the grand canyon mainly because their working their ass off at work or their just barely making ends with their monthly expenses.

The filipinos are very generous people and maawin so as long as theres givers there will always be leeches and parasites...

[empy]

kaya siguro hindi ako masyadong popular sa mga kamag-anak ko dito sa US at sa Pilipinas. i only help those who want to help themselves (e.g. i will help you get a job but i won't give you money)...and i expect to neither give nor receive free stuff (unless regalo op kors)

[mbeige]

My friends always ask me the same question about money I earn here in the US and my spending. I keep saying it's all proportional. Money here is easily earned but if you use it for daily living, there's still some left for you to save. Pero sa Manila, like my wife told me, she works and works pero cannot have something set aside to save dahil sobrang baba ng sweldo. She used to work sa call center which gave her PhP15k and that's roughly $300 for a month. Tapos bawas pa tax, etc. Ako I'm able to work in a small store for $400 a month plus my second job that rakes in $200 a month (which I still have time for, and I'm also a full time student). Time is not utilized well considering both traffic, how the people tend to get laid back and relax/lenient, and the "mamaya na" mentality.

Great dilemma is the market in the Philippines is product-based. The service, labor and pagod that Pinoys put out is not compensated nor paid for. Instead, they consider it part of the product. Pero in the end, who profits? The manufacturers, not the employees. My friend told me the US is service-based/oriented and hence, people get paid for good service too.

Makes sense?

[bender]

That type of situation is not isolated to OFW's. I have a colleague who has been fired from a senior sales manager position because he had some personal financial obligations with the very people he was supposed to be supervising. I couldn't understand why this colleague would need to borrow money when he is earning a lot although i was suspicious because he is already retirable. It turns out that his kids who are already married are still dependent on him. He was giving them an allowance as well as setting up businesses for them financed by the people he was supposed to managing.

On the otherhand, jobs are hard to obtain in the Philippines especially for those who didn't finish their education and lack rudimentary skills. Giving them money is just a waste as they don't have any idea on how to put it to productive use. If they didn't waste it on personal extravagance, they would easily be swindled out of it because they don't know how to invest it properly.

[Jun aka Pekto]

I'm not afraid to tell leeches, er kin whenever they call, "I'm on a $20/week allowance. What do you want? *CLICK*"

It's a good thing I grew up here. It gives me enough room so as not to be obligated to support kin in the Philippines. Just the same, we help those kin who are intelligent and tries so hard in school and college but just needs a little helping hand. We've been doing it a while. So, we know if requests for money are genuine from the kids or just the parents wanting to leech off.

We're not rich either. If we were, we'd have a his and hers BMW or Caddie instead of the Sonata and Contour. But, we do share what wealth we can.

Edit: Speaking of the Grand Canyons. We've been here for 3 years and the Grand Canyons (and Meteor Crater) is only 5 hours away. Yet, we still haven't made a visit. Yup. Too busy earning a living.

[architect]

*tsupermario

"surely if the unselfish applicant made it abroad, the battle is at least half won isn't it?"

How can you say the battle is at least half won if they go abroad to sell their bodies and souls, especially in the case of those who end up as *** workers?

[uls]

People (the masses) here live such simple lives that it takes very little for them to be content.

The masses are so used to hardship, basta may makain at matulugan, and toma, ok na.

Everyone wants the easy life ---- easy life meaning: palamunin, tambay, lasheng.

So if an OFW is sending X amount of USD every month... and any number of dependents here get free meals and free living space from that, they no longer have a reason to look for work. They're now ok..

[Gumusut_Amige]

sa isang banda, mas maganda na rin yung nagbibigay kaysa umaasa. and glad that my wife is kind sometimes... hehehe