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  1. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    3,147
    #11
    Originally posted by otanex
    ibang klase ang kahilingan ng babae,,, JAGUAR for the transportation.. heheehehe..
    from an arab perspective:

    all these money + jag for a little pussy?

  2. Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Posts
    4,086
    #12
    walangya..business writing yan eh..hehehe..

  3. Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    2,421
    #13
    ok ah....sigurista nga lg

  4. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    287
    #14
    Dear Sirs:
    Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting software, severely limiting access to wardrobe, flower, and jewelry applications that operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalls many other valuable programs such as DinnerDancing 7.5, CruiseShip 2.3, and Opera Night 6.1 and installs new, undesirable programs such as Poker Night 1.3, SaturdayFootball 5.0, Golf 2.4 and ClutterEverywhere 4.5. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and invariably crashes the system. Under no circumstances will it run DiaperChanging 14.1or HouseCleaning 2.6. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix Husband 1.0, but this all purpose utility is of limited effectiveness. Can you help please!!!!

    Jane

    --------------------------------------

    Dear Jane,

    This is a very common problem women complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 with no idea that Boyfriend 5.0 is merely an ENTERTAINMENT package. However, Husband 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and was designed by its creator to run as few applications as possible. Further, you cannot purge Husband 1.0 and return to Boyfriend 5.0, because Husband 1.0 is not designed to do this. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Boyfriend 5.0 to emulate Husband 1.0, so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system, once installed.

    Any new program files can only be installed once per year, as Husband 1.0 has severely limited memory. Error messages are common, and a normal part of Husband 1.0 In desperation to play some of their "old time" favorite applications, or to get new applications to work, some women have tried to install Boyfriend 6.0, or Husband 2.0. However, these women end up with more problems than encountered with Husband 1.0. Look in your manual under "Warnings Divorce/Child Support". You will notice that this program runs very poorly, and comes bundled with HeartBreak 1.3. I recommend you keep Husband 1.0, and just learn the quirks of this strange and illogical system.

    Having Husband 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). This is a wonderful feature of Husband 1.0, secretly installed by the parent company as an integral part of the operating system. Husband 1.0 must assume ALL responsibility for ALL faults and problems, regardless of the root cause. To activate this great feature enter the command "C:\I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME" Sometimes Tears 6.2 must be run simultaneously while entering the command. Husband 1.0 should then run the applications Apologize 12.3 and Flowers/Chocolates 7.8.

    TECH TIP!
    Avoid excessive use of this feature. Overuse can create additional and more serious GPFs, and ultimately YOU may have to give a "C:\APOLOGIZE" command before the system will return to normal operations. Overuse can also cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, or worse yet, Beer 6.0 Beer 6.0 is a very bad program that causes Husband 1.0 to create FatBelly files and SnoringLoudly wave files that are very hard to delete. Save your- self some trouble by following this tech tip.

    Just remember! The system will run smoothly, and take the blame for all GPFs, but because of this fine feature it can only intermittently run all the applications Boyfriend 5.0 ran. Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional soft-ware to improve performance. I personally recommend HotFood 3.0, Lingerie 5.3 and Patience 10.1. Used in conjunction, these utilities can really help keep Husband 1.0 running smoothly.

    After several years of use, Husband 1.0 will become familiar and you will find many valuable embedded features such as FixesBroken Things 2.1, Snuggling 4.2 and BestFriend 7.6.

    A final word of caution! Do NOT, under any circumstances, install MotherInLaw 1.0. This is not a supported application, and will cause selective shut down of the operating system. Husband 1.0 will run only Fishing 9.4 and Hunting 5.2 until MotherInLaw 1.0 is uninstalled.

    I hope these notes have helped. Thank you for choosing to install Husband 1.0 and we here at Tech Support wish you the best of luck in coming years. We trust you will learn to fully enjoy this product!"

  5. Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    266
    #15
    Acceptance of BF


    Dear Johny,

    I am please to inform you that effective today I am hereby accepting you as my Acting Boyfriend. As such you shall report to me everynow and then.

    It is understood that you will undergo a testing period after which you will then be my regular Boyfriend.

    Your benefits will be free holding hands, Going out to a class restaurant and free to visit me in the house untill 8PM.

    Moreover, upon permanency to Regular BF, your benefits will be upgraded.

    Congratulations.


    Juana.




    Upon approval as Regular BF ......



    Dear Johny,

    This is to confirm you as my regular BF, with a corresponding benefits of Kissing me anytime you want, bring me to a place you want and Timeless visit.

    It is understood further that you should be a good boyfriend to me and perform well to make me happy and satisfied.

    Moreover, your previous benefits during your acting period still carries.

    Thank you I hope you will like it. Congratulations.



    Juana

  6. Join Date
    Jan 1970
    Posts
    2,244
    #16
    nice... did u write those letters?

  7. Join Date
    May 2004
    Posts
    266
    #17
    It' my own idea, madam gretzy.

  8. Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Posts
    5,850
    #18
    Ganda naman ng mga love letters niyo..:D

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Sample of a Modern Love Letter