Question for married guys

[woohoo]

From the day that i propose till the first few months ng planning, 100% sure na ko na gusto ko na magpakasal. Pero habang lumalapit na, nararamdaman ko na yung pressure from family tsaka yung mga tasks ng pagpeprepare na nakakapagod.. Lately ko nalang naisip lahat to (haha.. pasensya na kung may na-offend ako). Kung baga, bigla ko na lang natatanong sa sarili ko if i'm really prepared for this. Di rin naman kasi natin maalis minsan lalo na sa mga major decisions na magkaron ng second thoughts. Pero syempre mahal ko yung girl and i don't wanna end up with someone else, kaya lang pag kinasal ka, narealize ko na hindi lang yung babae pakakasalan mo kundi pati yung family nya and your new obligations.

No offense, bro, please bear with me...

Sa mga tasks sa preparations na iyan, sa tingin ko lang, ha, tinatamad ka lang kaya ka nagkakaganyan. Hindi ka naman nawawalan ng gana or what. Ganyan kasi ako noon, e.

Maraming nagsasabi, kapag medyo hindi kasundo ng isang tao ang mga potential in-laws niya, na "hindi naman sila ang pakakasalan mo, iyung siyota mo lang." Technically, they're right. But in reality, they're veerrry wrong... Lahat talaga ng miyembro ng pamilya niya, kailangan mo siyempreng pakisamahan. Kaya dapat talaga, kasundo mo sila lahat, or at least kaya mong sikmurain, hindi iyung gustung-gusto mo silang sikmuraan.

Now, if you're really having second thoughts, I suggest na huwag mo na munang ituloy. Kaso, sa ganitong postponement, kahit gaano pa ka-valid at ka-considerate sa pag-iwas sa isang hinaharap na masalimuot ("love, mabuti nang i-postpone na muna natin, kesa naman magpakasal tayo tapos lagi na lang tayong mag-aaway o lagi na lang kaming mag-aaway ng nanay mo/baka maghiwalay lang tayo, <insert your noble reason here> etc..."), masasaktan pa rin ang GF mo. You're in between a rock and hard place, bro.

Siguro naman nawawala naman ang mga agam-agam mo tuwing masisilayan ng mga mata mo ang love mo... kapag ganun, haaay, huwag nang mag-alinlangan pa...

[aga_cruz]

8 months before kasal o 8 months before sakal hehehehe

[emanzano]

pare ko, think thrice before you get married. your life will almost be unrecognizeable once you get married (and this is coming from a guy who adores his wife).

all i can say is, life will be UNBEARABLE if you marry the wrong person. i say this cuz iba talaga when you're with the same person all the time. i imagine if i ended up marrying my ex, we would have probably killed each other by now.

good luck dude.

[jayemkay]

pare ko, think thrice before you get married. your life will almost be unrecognizeable once you get married (and this is coming from a guy who adores his wife).

all i can say is, life will be UNBEARABLE if you marry the wrong person. i say this cuz iba talaga when you're with the same person all the time. i imagine if i ended up marrying my ex, we would have probably killed each other by now.

good luck dude.

hahaha good point there. when you get to a point in your relationship where you try to envision a lifetime together with your gf, and you can't seem to paint a clear picture of it, then malamang she's not the one for you. marami nako dinaanang pagsubok sa buhay with my wife, and sometimes i think back na what if ung isa sa mga ex ko ung kasama kong dumaan dun, i can't imagine na tatagal sila. And it's thoughts like that which make my wife seem more and more perfect to me each day.

[nitrox]

I think the tasks in preparing for the wedding is an exercise for both of you on how you can work together, agree and even disagree on various matters. Talagang nakakapagod asikasuhin lahat ng iyan, and that's part of the process. Kailangan may personal touch yung wedding nyo and it should somehow reflect your personalities.

You automatically become a member of your wife's family. But you should tell your wife that ikaw na ang 1st priority nya at hindi na ang family nya (that goes the same for you too). You should both tell your parents that you have brought them this far and its now up to you (and your wife) to "set you free". They should never think na mawawalan sila ng anak, but they gain another daughter or a son. But of course they will always be around to offer any assistance to both of you. With your spouse being the 1st priority is what the other guys here are saying na "maiiba ang buhay nyo".

I strongly suggest you and your fiancee attend the Discovery Weekend in Ateneo. Make-or-break seminar yon. Both of you will come to realize whether married life is the path you want to take as a couple.

[macsd]

Ano mga nararamdaman nyo nung malapit na kayong ikasal, say 8 months before the wedding? Marami din ba kayong naiisip like malapit nang mawala ang freedom mo at gusto mo nang sulitin yung natitirang time before you get married? O kaya naman medyo nagdadalawang isip ka kung gusto mo nga talagang mag-asawa?
hehe.. ingat sa pagsagot baka masabon kayo ni misis..

the only thing that changes is your status from single to married, the rest shall still remain the same. why should you change when she will marry you because you are what you. the very moment you changed, that's the end of it all and the answer to your question.

[dikosoulheart]

agree...............

[calix0305]

keyword: R E S P O N S I B I L I T Y

(esp. if you have kids...)

[Retz]

better stay single. mahirap ang married life ung salapi o sweldo mo mapupunta na sa mga gamit ng baby niyo.

[uls]

^^

syempre gagastusan mo anak mo yan eh