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  1. Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    134
    #111
    sobrang hirap talaga sa sitwasyon na yan.kung mag ka balikan kayo ng wife mo mahirap na.sa inlaws pa lang bad record kana.

    kasi kung mag ka balikan kayo ng wife mo may gap na kayo.
    isipin mo din yun mga inlaws mo kahit mag ka balikan kayo ng wife mo galit parin sila sayo.

    isipin mo nalang ang kids mo.

  2. Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    2,267
    #112
    Quote Originally Posted by twistedmind View Post

    Yes, this is the first time I cheated. My life before was purely work and family, office and house lang ako lagi. Even if there are stag party or my friends will celebrate birthday in a club, never did I go.
    hirap talaga pag mabait ka. mataas ang expectations. isang mali lang eh hirap lusutan.

    hinde katulad pag alam ng misis mo na chickboy ka na talaga kahit dati pa. parang expected na gagawa ng mali. hay buhay!

  3. Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    1,382
    #113
    1. Ask for her forgiveness
    2. If she doesn't forgive you, then ask her if you can be her friend.
    3. Tell her how much you love your family especially your kids.
    4. Don't try too much. If she is not ready to reconcile, then don't force it.
    5. Don't exaggerate.
    6. Try to move on withour her.
    7. Try to talk to her or have a decent conversation.
    8. Don't dwell on negative things. God is good. He has plans for you and your family.
    9. Make the most out of the situation and just continue your life as it is

    and last but not the least.....

    10. Tell her this, "fatherhood is a lifetime commitment and cannot be ended even by a failed relationship".

    GOOD LUCK!

  4. Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3,361
    #114
    Have you guys tried going to therapy? If she won't go, go alone.

  5. Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    62
    #115
    Ngaun k lng nbsa to pero ang sad naman nyan, ang hirap ng situation n ganyan..

    pero atleast nkikita mo na sila..

    ung sa U.S de ata nila pwde dalhin ang mga bata kc kailangan may consent galing sau de sila makakalusot sa DSWD

  6. Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    172
    #116
    ngayon ko lang nabasa ito matagal na pala... so sad naman

    dont worry po sir lagi ko kayo isasama sa mga prayers ko...

    if ok lang PM mo me para makuha ko complete name mo,kc hirap mag pray kay Lord if "twistedmind" ang sasabihin ko jejeje joke!

    cheers :cheers2:

  7. Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    37,163
    #117
    tagal na pala nito, I think it's time for you to move on...ayaw na talaga saiyo ng asawa mo..at least nahihiram mo naman ang mga kids mo, I think ok na yan

  8. Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    1,985
    #118
    I agree with what Mikaztro said about just being friends if she can't accept you back as her husband. Give her time and when she is ready she'll come around and if she doesn't at the very least you two will be in good terms as friends.

  9. Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    1,455
    #119
    Quote Originally Posted by twistedmind View Post
    Hello everyone. Before you all condemn me, I admit its my fault my mistake and no reason can justify me having an affair.

    We are married for 9 years and are blessed with 2 lovely children both boys 9 and 4. We are happy as a family, we often go outings and every sunday is a family day. Just like the common reason medyo neglected ako ng wife ko, when i go home ask lang sya kung kumain na ako and that's it, she continues watching tv na, all the house chores mga maid na ang gumagawa ng decision, wala kasi hilig ang wife ko sa mga gawain bahay.

    We also have a problem with each other, our physical intimacy has gone down to almost zero for the last 4 years we only made love less than 5 times and there was a year na completely zero. Lagi sya pagod, tinatamad, wala sa mood or inaantok, in fairness wala naman sya 3rd party. But inspite of that hindi naman ako nag rebelde by going to clubs and bars, work bahay pa din ako until one day may nakilala ako isang girl na friend ng barkada ko. Madalas na ako sumasama sa kanila pagumaalis sila whether mall lang or eat out. Then naging close kami nitong other girl.

    Our affair started early last year and a few months ago my wife found out about it and hindi na din ako naka deny dahil may mga common friends kami nagsabi na din sa knya. The problem is hindi ko agad nabitiwan ang girl so after a month pinalayas ako ng wife ko sa condo ko, umalis na lang din ako dahil ayaw ko mga kids ko sa in law ko lumipat. But every weekends and no classes dun sila sa in laws ko nag stay para hindi ko sila mapuntahan sa condo. During schooldays naman hindi ko din sila pwde visit sa condo paguwi nila kasi nandun na din wife ko. I just go to their school and nakakasama ko sila for 10 min. papunta ng parking lot.
    But lately ayaw hindi na nila ako pinapansin coz mom said may ibang gf na daw ako and hindi ko sila love and better forget their dad and if nalaman na kinausap nila ako hindi sila isasama mamasyal.

    I hate myself for entering into that relationship and for not ending it, now hindi ko na makasama mga anak ko. Sobra pa naman kaming close lalo both boys. Almost 4 months na kami hiwalay and now sem break na hindi ko nakikita mga kids. Sabi ng in law ko kung gusto ko mag demanda daw ako and hindi sila natatakot, mdyo well off kasi sila and have lots of political friends so they know very well i'm not capable of doing it. I've lost 20 lbs the last 2 months and i don't know the meaning of smile na.

    There's no one to blame except me and ito ang consequence ng nagawa ko. I have no parents and siblings so now I'm all alone. Ayaw na din ng wife ko makipag usap sa akin and I've went to a marriage counsellor Fr. Dave Clay and sabi nya he needs to talk to my wife too dahil may problem na daw ang marriage namin even before my affair pero ayaw mag reply ng wife ko sa invitation nya. Sobrang hirap and depressed ako everyday, wala naman ako magawa dahil ayaw na din ako kausapin ng wife ko.

    Anyone have the same problem before?? Or may alam ba kayo support groups with same problems like me?

    My fault, My mistake My stupidity.
    think of it this way,at least ngayon may time ka na sa sarili mo and you are with a woman na mukhang masaya ka naman...as for the kids. let them know that you still love them. tell them the truth

  10. Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    21,347
    #120
    Hanggang ngayon pala, problemado pa rin si Twistedmind......

    6 mos. na nakaraan, Bro. Musta naman si Misis? Ayaw kang pansinin, ayaw ka pa ring kausapin, baka naman meron na rin siyang iba? Sa kuwento mo, before that incident, parang wala na rin siyang amor sa iyo, eh.

    You mentioned that "medyo" neglected ka, meaning di ka inaasikaso, walang siyang pakialam sa iyo, no TLC at all. And, eto matindi, "Our physical intimacy has gone down to almost zero for the last 4 years we only made love less than 5 times and there was a year na completely zero".

    Damn! This is just too much!

    Total, you have shown remorse on what you have done, pinagsisihan mo na. Talk to her. Try to win her trust. Pero kung matigas pa sa bato damdamin ng Misis mo at wala na talaga......better move on na lang. Make yourself normal. Nami-meet mo na naman ang mga kids mo, every other week. Pakonsuwelo na yan.

    Isa lang masasabi ko sa iyo Bro..........Maawa ka sa sarili mo.

My wife found out about my affair